You asked about children out here. We frequently come across groups of children and mostly they are very friendly. They smile at us and shake our hands, but the more unsure ones just watch us with big round eyes. I’ve learned a few words from our translator that help to break the ice, but we see little in the way of bad behaviour. Maybe you should try carrying a rifle around at school and see if your kids’ behaviour improves!?!
I like the sound of Humphrey. How long have you had him? Is he yours, or your family’s? Do you think he would like me?
He paused, unsure of how to go on. Should he let on a little of how he felt, or would that just scare her off? Maybe if he was light-hearted about it?
Back to your list of likes and dislikes – Do you have any idea how many letters I receive every week? Maybe you think I have hordes of mail. A good-looking chap like me, of course I do. Actually, no. Apart from my mother’s ramblings once every couple of weeks, telling me just how wonderful my brother is, there is only you. Shocked? I know, it’s unbelievable! Then you must be able to see how dangerous it is to write the words ‘shower’ and ‘fresh linen’ so close together in a letter to a soldier on a six month tour… Beautiful woman, shower, bed… Bagpipes, bagpipes, bagpipes! Okay. I’m all right again now.
Tell me about the kids you teach and about the parks in bloom.
Send me a picture, please.
Your lonely soldier,
Andy
PS Middle name? – Not even close!
Was that too much? Andy almost screwed it up and started again. But he stopped. Faint heart never won fair maid, he thought, and sealed it up and wrote her address carefully on the front.
He wrote the name, age and address of both the girls on the back of their photos and shoved them in his pocket then folded up Sam’s letter, placing it neatly away with the others he had hiding in his things. Deed done.
Sam read Andy’s next letter and blushed. She had never intended to be provocative. It had been an honest mistake. Well, not a mistake, but she had never even thought how her words might make him feel. ‘Beautiful woman’ he had said. Her? He was picturing her. Sam’s stomach clenched. What was this she was feeling? She looked at the photo smiling at her from the back of her desk. But there was Dean. So how should she reply?
Dear Andy,
I’m not sure where the school stands on teachers carrying arms in class, but I shall certainly look into it.
Humphrey is mine. I’ve had him about 18 months and he’s adorable. But would he like you? Probably not. He’s not very good at sharing my attention, but don’t be afraid, he’s not the kind of dog to savage a man. He might lick you to death, but apart from the odd yap, he’s completely harmless.
I bike through a beautiful park on the way to school and back every day. The grass is very green at the moment because we have had quite a bit of rain. The borders are full of colour and the pond is dappled with quacking ducks. A weeping willow hangs lazily on one side and I have to duck down under its branches on my way through. I know I shouldn’t be riding through the park, but there’s no one around at that time of the morning, so don’t tell, okay?
What do you get up to in your time off? Do you get time off? I’m sorry; I’m a bit of an idiot when it comes to knowing anything about the army.
It got up to 22 degrees over here today. How hot is it with you?
I’ve got parents’ evenings coming up this week - ugh! - So long days and lots of work for me. I need my pillow.
Write soon,
Your weary schoolteacher,
Sam
PS gargoyles don’t keep pictures of themselves! I could describe myself if that would do?
PPS Heathcliff?
Three days later a small terraced house came up for sale on the edge of town. It was an old place, but it had been well kept and updated over the years. It had one good-sized bedroom, a little room and a bathroom upstairs and a living room, cloakroom and kitchen downstairs. Sam took her mum and dad along to see it, hoping for their approval and she wasn’t disappointed. Sam had been left a large amount of money by her grandmother a few years before and had been saving as much as she could ever since to afford a place of her own. So when the next letter arrived, she had plenty of news to tell.
Dearest Sam,
You obviously still have no idea how many times I read your letters. Can I just say that your turn of phrase is destroying me? How is a guy supposed to concentrate on killing all the bad guys when the words ‘lick to death’, ‘hot’ and ‘pillow’ are swimming around in his brain? What are you trying to do to me?! And if you think you’re going to get away without sending me a picture of you, you’ve got another thing coming. Gargoyle, indeed! You’re beautiful. I have met you, remember. If you can manage to look at a picture of my ugly mug and still put pen to paper, I’m sure I can look at you. And no, a description will not do. Unless it is in the style of a hot Mills and Boon novel, of course? Ahhh! Bagpipes! No, I couldn’t take it!!! Nuns. Nuns. Okay.
I take it this is a pushbike you ride every day? You’re not a Hell’s Angel, are you? The park sounds wonderful. What I wouldn’t give to walk barefoot around the soft green grass in that park right now.
Yes. In answer to your question, we do get down time. Some guys play cards, some listen to music. There is time to write letters and re-read old ones. The mundane things that back home would take a matter of minutes take a lot longer out here, as everything has to be done by hand, so that fills up a bit of time too. Guys like Spike tend to keep fit - tell your friend Kate to expect a letter very soon – and others like Karl – Chloe’s guy – just top up their tans. My hidden talent, it seems, lies in poker. I’m getting pretty good, even if I do say so myself.
The weather out here is hot, with intermittent bouts of scorching sun to break-up the monotony. It got up to a balmy forty three today! I’ll send you some over if you like.
Write soon, WITH PHOTOS!
Yours,
Andy x
PS Still no!
Sam had reached a watershed. To go on now would be to admit there was more to this relationship than just friendship. Friendly banter had gone and flirtation was now definitely on the table. Was this really what she wanted?
For the first time, Sam decided not to write back straight away. She understood this would mean the reply would also be delayed because of this, but it was important to be sure of what to say. She pushed the letter to the back of her desk and looked hard at the handsome soldier who smiled back at her from there. She rang Kate and arranged to go out the following night and then went downstairs to see her mum.
After a while, her mum said, “You’re not your usual self tonight, love. Is anything wrong?”
Sam shook her head.
“Only you’re usually full of the joys of spring after you’ve had a letter.”
Sam thought about this. “Just a tiring day, I guess.”
“But the house is still going ahead all right,