Poppy shut her eyes and groaned. ‘“The health and safety of the earth and all its residents”. Are you ever going to let me forget that? And you can drop your hand, I know you’re laughing at me.’
Ben did as he was told, holding back a snort-laugh when Poppy flicked him the two-fingered salute. ‘Well you went through our rubbish and separated everything out and made Mum solemnly swear that she’d never let a recyclable into the bin again. It was the funniest thing. I think she fell a bit in love with you that day.’ That made two of us. Ben pushed the thought away. There was no point in entertaining feelings from the past. They’d gotten him nowhere then, they weren’t going to get him anywhere now. He had to get his brain off this thought track, and the best way to do that was to change the subject. ‘Interesting bracelet, Poppy. Where’d you get it?’
‘This old thing?’ Poppy held up a bronze chain filled with charms.
Amongst the collection, Ben spotted a koala, a rugby ball, a tiny pizza slice, a water buffalo. A random assortment, yet somehow on Poppy it worked.
‘It’s just how I keep track of where I’ve been. A charm for every town or country I’ve visited. And don’t try and distract me from our conversation, Ben. Let’s get back to you.’ Her bracelet jangled as she pointed in his direction. ‘Now, tell me, why isn’t there a Meredith in your life? To be honest I was surprised you and Milly didn’t get back together after I left. She was a Meredith all the way.’
‘Milly was a bit of a Meredith. Although she sounds like she’s loosened up.’ Ben folded the gravy through the rice.
‘“Sounds”? Are you two still in contact?’ Poppy picked up a napkin and wiped at a splodge of red gravy that had nestled in the groove of her mouth. ‘All gone?’
‘Not quite.’ Ben took the napkin and patted away another splodge that had landed on her chin, then passed the napkin back to Poppy. ‘You still eat like a starving animal.’
‘Habit of a lifetime.’ Poppy’s lips turned down in what looked like a frown, but in a blink of an eye it was gone, a smile in its place. ‘Anyway, back to Milly. I didn’t know you two still talked.’
‘It’s a recent thing. She called. Said she was going to be in the area. We’ve texted each other a bit.’ Ben gave a non-committal shrug. ‘Anyway, maybe I’m just not in the market for a pearl-clutching Meredith type of woman. Maybe I’d prefer a woman with a bit of fire in her belly. Someone fun, funny, not afraid to take a chance. Someone with a good heart. I don’t suppose you know anyone who fits that description?’
Poppy leaned forward, a gleam in her eyes. ‘Not off the top of my head, but maybe I could help you find her. We could load up some dating apps onto your phone. Go through the prospects together. It’d be great fun!’ Poppy looked around the shop. ‘Where’s your phone? Let’s put together a profile and get you out there.’ She leaned over to snatch up the phone lying at his side, groaning as Ben whipped it up before she could get her hands on it.
‘Let’s not, Poppy.’ Ben tucked the phone in his back pocket, well out of reach of Poppy’s grabby hands. ‘I know you’ll think me boring. Too traditional. But I like the idea of meeting a girl the old-fashioned way. Like, at a bar, or at the shops, or when I’m jogging in the park.’
‘You mean you want a romantic movie type meeting?’ Poppy stroked her chin and gazed into the distance. ‘Maybe I could go places with you and you could point out women that you like the look of and I could maybe throw you in front of them and make it looked like you tripped?’
Air-sucking frustration built in Ben’s chest. He had to shut this down. The last person he wanted to talk about love with was the only woman he’d ever fallen for. The one woman he’d had to work hard to get over. ‘You know, I could ask the same of you, Pops. You haven’t mentioned anyone, so I’m guessing there’s no man in your life?’
‘God, no.’ Poppy gagged. ‘No boyfriend. I don’t do boyfriends. At least, I don’t do the serious ones.’ Poppy visibly shuddered. ‘I’m always honest with any man who shows interest. I tell them I am in it for a fun time, not a long time. I tell them if I see a hint of their wanting more then I’m out.’
‘But why? What have you got against relationships?’ Ben set his fork down. Something was wrong. Off. He couldn’t believe that Poppy with her big, kind heart didn’t do relationships.
‘It’s quite simple. I don’t believe in them because I don’t believe in that kind of love.’ Poppy took a sip of her wine and set it down with a nonchalant shrug. ‘Stop looking so freaked out, it’s no big deal.’
‘No big deal? But you were just trying to get me dating. Marry me off. How can someone who doesn’t believe in love do that?’
‘I was just trying to inject some fun in your life, Ben. Not love. Besides, you’re the marrying type. The type who’d make it work even once what you thought was love died out. People do it all the time. They stay together for financial reasons. Or because they know no better. Or out of stubbornness. Not for love. Love is really just a bunch of hormones racing around your body that make you hook up with someone so that babies can be made and the human race gets to continue. Love’s really just a giant myth as far as I’m concerned. A fairy tale to keep you warm at night.’
Ben pushed his plate away, his appetite as existent as Poppy’s belief in happy-ever-afters. ‘How can you say it’s a myth? My mother and father have stuck it out through thick and thin for over thirty-five years. They’re proof that love exists.’
‘But that’s the thing. You just said it yourself. They’ve “stuck it out”. If love was real you wouldn’t have to stick it out. And it’s not like my parents are the best example. My father left before I was born. And my mother…’ Poppy paused as colour flooded her cheeks, and her eyes drifted to the window. The look in her juniper-green eyes was as dark as the night sky. ‘Well, she wasn’t the best role model.’
Ben wanted to ask why, but Poppy’s taut jaw told him she wasn’t about to elaborate. He checked the time on his watch. Nearly eleven. He had to be up in a few hours to get his morning swim and workout in. Needed that time to plan out his day. To figure out what had to be done, and the best way to do it. But he didn’t want to leave Poppy like this. All twisted and tortured by some aspect of her past that she clung to. That haunted her. He had to go, but before he did he wanted to see the sadness in Poppy’s eyes recede, to see them brighten once more.
‘You know, Pops, you may not believe in love, but I know you believe in friendship. And I probably should have said this when we decided… well, when we were kind of forced into business together. But I’m glad you’re back, Poppy. Really glad.’ Ben raised his cup. ‘To the rekindling of a beautiful relationship.’
Poppy’s jaw relaxed as she raised her cup. ‘To a beautiful friendship. One where I won’t have to worry about you going all lovey-dovey on me. The best kind.’ The shine returned to her eyes, as her ever-present inner light beat off the dark. ‘The only kind.’
‘Indeed. The only kind.’ Ben clinked his cup against Poppy’s and ignored the stab her words had brought to his gut. Indigestion. That was all it was. All it could possibly be.
The sight of towering boxes, threatening to topple over, sent an army of ants marching through Poppy’s stomach.
There was so much to unpack. So much to set up. And such little time to do it.
Although the way the tower was teetering, there was a chance one floor-shuddering step would see her die under a box avalanche.
Death by unicorn.
How