If no-one can offer you a reasonable discount, one option is to decide whether to ditch said supply altogether – how much do you really want chair covers? – while the other route is to ask for recommendations. Most good businesspeople know the competition, and will have done their own price research. They’ll be able to put you in touch with competitors who offer a similar or slightly lesser service (like someone talented without the experience to prove it) at a less expensive price than theirs. And that gives you a lower price point from which to get the whole negotiating process going again with the new name.
It’s seriously that simple. Admittedly it might be tougher if you’ve found somebody seriously niche – no-one was budging on the price of the three-foot-high light-up ‘love’ sign we wanted, since you don’t exactly see those every day – but as long as there’s competition for what you’re after (there are always plenty of bakers, hairdressers, make-up artists and photographers), there’s going to be room for monetary manoeuvre. Just try it.
Chapter 2
Eat, drink and be merry for less
I’m starting here because this is likely to be your biggest outlay. Between hiring the place, getting your registrar over and feeding and watering everybody, it’s one part of your day that can quickly pile on the pounds.
Before You Start
If you haven’t read my golden rules back in The Basics, now’s the time do it – trust me, not-so big spender, they’re absolutely worth it. Once you’ve decided whether to go off-season, get hitched on a weekday, keep your guest list trim or get married in three months flat, then we’ll talk.
You Little Fibber
It’s a sad fact that the word ‘wedding’ sounds like ‘kerching!’ in the minds of some venues and suppliers – they know you’re planning the perfect day, and they think you’ll sell your car to pay for it. An industry tip that gets bandied around is to tell them you’re planning a ‘family party’ – and it can work, too, if you’ve got the nerve to stick to it.
When I first started planning my big day, I chickened out and owned up – worried that they’d try and stick me with a big bill when I turned up in a white dress – but the experience was an eye-opener that might make you think twice about being quite so forthcoming.
Here’s how my little tale of woe went: I found a beautiful venue online and emailed them asking what it would cost to hire a room, have a barbecue for about 100 people and bring in a DJ for dancing later. I said it was a ‘family party’ since the plan was to have my ceremony and all the actual matrimonial stuff at the registry office, then rock up there later.
Back came the chirpy reply from an enthusiastic salesperson, attaching reams of barbecue menus and quoting me a fee our budget liked. Ecstatic, we called her up, agreed to come and see the place and what do you know? There we were in the entrance hall a few days later. And that’s where it happened: she asked me what kind of ‘family party’ I was having, and I cracked: “Well it’s a wedding reception, but it’s just the party, not the ceremony or anything.”
Before I could blink she’d told me that they couldn’t do barbecues for weddings, only three-course meals, and that we couldn’t have the room we wanted – funnily enough the only ones we could now have were more expensive.
Why? I didn’t have to have a room that was certified for weddings – we’d already have had the ceremony before we got there. And I wasn’t changing the plan for the party one iota – we didn’t want posh chops on the BBQ or some kind of lovey-dovey wedding DJ. That didn’t seem to matter though – she was changing it, in no uncertain terms, and it was going to cost us – wait for it – double.
So it’s up to you if you’ve got the guts to try your luck – and if you do, make sure you read your contract carefully. Also keep in mind that this won’t fly if you’re planning to accost the registrar and turn up in your room of choice – it has to be certified if you want it for your ceremony.
But if you can get it away with it, you could end up having your reception somewhere you never really thought you could afford, and just the way you like it – not to mention that if they’re anything like our lot was, you could be getting it for half their normal nuptial rate.
Flexi Time
If you’re stuck on a traditional wedding venue – the country house, the big hotel – you’re going to have to be smart or it’s going to cost you. And even then, there will still be some sky-high hire prices or required bedroom rentals that will take certain venues out of the running. Wherever you get married, though, there are, as always, a few general rules that could help you keep the costs down.
The Ceremony
Let me say right from the start that you’ll almost always pay more to have your ceremony at your reception venue. You’ll generally pay over the odds to have a registrar come out to you to start with, and then
Do the numbers, but unless your reception venue is out in the sticks, even if you have to hop in your dad’s car or pre-book a taxi to get you from ‘I do’ to ‘woohoo!’ it’s likely to work out cheaper than doing it all in one place – and believe me, no-one will notice what car you arrive in now the Prosecco’s out and rings are on fingers.
The Reception
If you manage to find a place that comes in within budget and you’ve got the time to suss them out, don’t sign anything until you can tell whether they’re flexible. There are all sorts of ways to save on your reception as long as you can get your go-between to go for it.
Culinary Expertise
The three-course, sit-down meal is the most expensive way to feed your five thousand, hands down. Yes, it suits a formal gathering, and silver service always feels special, but weigh up how much you need it when it can be two or three times more than some other options.
If you have to have it, though, be clever: ask if you can serve your canapés as starters with the pre-reception drinks, or, if you really want to stay on your venue’s good side, they tend to prefer it if you opt for the wedding cake instead of dessert.
One option that’s similarly genteel, super-popular