We started to go out and, with my £120 per week allowance, we had some good times. All I did was train, so that money went a long way – we went out quite often. I would train first thing in the morning, about 5.30am, finish at about 7.30am and then start gym work at 2pm or 4pm depending on how I felt. At this point, I was touched with it, I was on heat to train. It was a passion that I could feel within my solar plexus, an inner passion. At first, the people around me were sceptical that I could keep this focused and have a woman in my life at the same time, but it was never an issue. I know it is for some fighters, but it never even started to become a problem for me. I’ve always remained my own man.
In a sense, because Karron was so easy to get on with, it eliminated the complication of having a difficult girlfriend. I knew this was the woman for me, so I started the relationship off correctly. I hadn’t been out with many women seriously up to this point. I had a girlfriend in England before I left for New York, and over a period of three and a half years, I only had two girlfriends over there. I was so focused with my training and also with the church. The scriptures taught me that you shouldn’t fornicate and I did the best I could! The thought was constantly in my mind but I took that energy and channelled it into training. Karron and I became close very quickly and moved into a flat together above a garage that Keith Miles owned. Bear in mind, I was not famous or wealthy at this point, so to this day I know Karron is with me for me, which for a celebrity is priceless.
My relationship with Keith Miles, however, was not working so well. He used to talk down to me, like I was an idiot. He would say, ‘Do as you are told.’ I must state that at times he was very nice and a real character, but when he spoke to me in a way that wasn’t dignified, I couldn’t accept that. I said to him, ‘When you disrespect me, I’d rather starve than accept your disrespect.’ So that business relationship ended, and with it went the flat above the garage.
We moved into a room in Karron’s mother’s house in early 1989, during which time Karron became pregnant with our first child, Christopher. We had all our belongings in this one little room, with a fold-up futon to sit on and a little kitten for a pet. I was training very hard by now and some of that time was spent with the superb boxer, Herol Graham.
That first fight that Karron had watched before we were even dating was the only time in 47 contests that she came to see an actual bout. I would never have my wife, mother, father or children at the fight. Boxing matches are a desperate situation and I could never understand how fighters wanted their family present. I realise some say it motivates them, but I could never understand that. I wouldn’t even allow my father to watch (mind you, he wouldn’t have wanted to), he would have had a drink and torn the place down in excitement! When I later had a gym upstairs at home, my kids occasionally came up to watch me train but never saw me sparring.
While we had been trying for our first child, I said to Karron, ‘It is not possible that we will have a girl. It will be a boy and his name will be Christopher.’ There was no more than a 0.001% chance of having a girl. Karron didn’t see it that way, but I was convinced. I spoke about this in the press (I was starting to attract media attention with my lengthening unbeaten record) in a very blunt fashion and they made a big headline out of it, but that was not fair. Sure enough though, Christopher arrived on 18 September 1989.
I felt the same when we had our second child, Sebastian, on 18 July 1991. By then, I thought it would be nice to have a girl and I honestly feel that by relenting in my mind, we had Emily, who arrived on 19 April 1994. Since then we have also had little Joseph, on 23 October 1996. I was very proud to be present at all their births.
Some boxers are affected for the worse when they have children but I was not softened towards the boxing business. Remember, I learned to fight in New York, and as the saying goes, if you can do it there you can do it anywhere. This was my job and I now had young mouths to feed and provide for. I always wanted to be successful, so I didn’t need a family to make me more motivated. Yes, they all have to be fed, clothed and put through school; with any child comes a responsibility which you have to attend to, your duty is to provide. However, I have always had a very strong sense of satisfying me, of becoming an accepted individual, something I am still chasing to this day. So, my drive for success in boxing never wavered one bit when the children arrived.
As mentioned briefly before, people in the fight business worry about the effect a relationship might have on a boxer’s heart. There is a saying which goes like this: ‘After a personal quarrel between a man and a woman, the former suffers chiefly from the idea of having wounded the other while the latter suffers from the idea of not having wounded the other enough. Thus she will endeavour by tears, sobs and discomposed mien to make his heart heavier.’ Marvellous. Fortunately for me, this was not the case with Karron.
I am very aware that my conduct in my private and public life can impact very heavily on my children’s lives as youngsters. Having a well-known father will mean that if there is a problem, everybody will know and they will have no refuge. So I must ensure that this never happens. You can’t get any closer than your family. My children are me, my children come before me and as an adult you come to realise that.
Christopher is very intelligent but doesn’t let me know. When I listen to him talking around other children his age, you can see and hear the intelligence. All his reports from school say he is a clever child, he always gets good reports, all Bs, the occasional A. Away from his studies, he is slightly absent-minded. He handles who his father is very well and whenever he stays around other children’s houses, I always get good comments from the parents. He is very well behaved outside of our house, but inside he is always fighting with Sebastian! Everybody likes him and speaks well of him.
I remember saying to him when he was only nine years old, ‘Don’t try to be like me, you may reach where I am, you may fall below or perhaps rise above, but just be who you are. Look to words, to passion, grow up to be a man. Remember this – if I can do it, so can you. Be the best you can be.’ He asked me once what dignity was and I said, ‘If you lose it, it is sad,’ and then explained why that was. I said if I ever tried again to become what I once was, namely champion, so long after retiring, then not only would I not be the father I once was, but also the public would recognise the fact that either I needed the money or still craved the fame. They would then laugh at me or say, ‘How sad.’ On hearing this explanation, the tears welled up in Christopher’s eyes, even though he was only nine years old.
Sebastian is going to be the black sheep. He is his own person. Whereas Christopher will be influenced, Sebastian has his own mind, his own common sense. When we are on holiday, he goes off with a group of other kids without us. He is clever, a good kid. He is the one who will take a stand, which is good. He is more daring – for example, he will fight with me and I will hit him in the arm with a hard blow and he will go, ‘Owl’ but come back at me! Christopher is not interested in all that. Sebastian likes shells, fossils, books – he’s read all the Harry Potter books. He is his own boy and will be his own man.
Emily is a really lovely girl. If she takes after her mother, she will do very well. I don’t know if her arrival made me more tender, I think perhaps that I had mellowed more with age anyway. I wasn’t brought up with any girls (as my sister stayed in Jamaica), so I didn’t see how my father would have treated a daughter but, suffice to say, Emily gets away with a lot more. The boys get away with NOTHING. I often let Emily get away with small things, although never the important stuff. That may be wrong, but I am yet to find out. I am tougher on the boys.
The youngest, Joseph, doesn’t understand fear, he is boisterous and has fight in him. If any of the children could be a fighter (and I vehemently don’t want that), he could. His character is already without fear, it is in his grain. He has watched how I deal with the other three children above him, so he can surmise how much he can push things – he looks at me, raises an eyebrow and tasks me! He will be like me. His devil-may-care attitude will only be contained when he sees that it doesn’t work and only gets you into trouble. Joseph reminds me very much of myself when I was a kid. Back then, I had my own agenda and was always busy. With Joseph,