One night in particular, Renee, Daniella and I watched as the adults danced naked, groping each other. We decided to pull a prank, and took turns sneaking up behind a busy couple and pinching them on the bum. We thought it was hilarious when they gave a startled jump. By the time they turned around to try and catch whoever did it, we’d be long gone and giggling in the corner.
We weren’t supposed to tell anyone outside the Family about our sexual freedom, as the adults called it. I was told that Systemites would not understand the truth and liberty we had, and I learned to lead a double life.
I remember singing at an orphanage one morning, and then having siesta time in our camper van before going to the TV studio in Athens to perform a Christmas song on a local TV show. We parked on the street, closed the flimsy curtains of the van and had what the adults called Love Up, or Cuddle Time.
My teacher Johnny Appleseed lay down beside me and stroked me while kissing me on the mouth. He opened his clothing and guided my hand to his penis and helped me to masturbate him. In the end, he finished himself off while I lay next to him. I was conscious of the others having sex around us. His eyes were closed, his mouth open while he panted and gasped. When he was finished he said a prayer.
‘Thank you Lord, that we can share with one another your love,’ he prayed, and then he rolled over for a short nap.
The whole time, I was scared – he was my teacher – and also because there were gaps in the curtains. I could hear the footsteps of people passing by, and I thought that at any minute someone could look in and see us.
When it was time for our appointment, as if none of the afternoon sex had happened, the adults made up our hair and gave us a little pep talk. ‘When we get in there, remember to smile and show God’s love. Don’t worry about the cameras, like Grandpa said, just sing from your heart and think of the lost souls who will be watching.’
We piled out of the van and into the studio. The TV presenter thought we were great and we pulled off a well-rehearsed performance. Of course, no one watching us would have had a clue what had gone on just an hour before behind the red curtains in the van.
When visitors came to the camp to stay with us, everyone dressed up a little more conservatively and I soon learned there were subjects we didn’t talk about with ‘outsiders’ – such as sex and our prophet Mo – and Mo Letters and Family publications such as the Davidito Letters would be tucked away from sight.
‘Sweetheart, my parents, your grandpa and grandma, are coming to visit us from England,’ Dad said one morning, after receiving a letter from them.
‘But we call Mo Grandpa,’ I said. ‘Is this another Grandpa?’
‘Yes, his name is Glen, and he’s my Dad.’
‘Oh. I might get confused if I call him Grandpa too,’ I said. After a moment I had figured out how to solve the problem. ‘Maybe I’ll call him Granddad, that way I won’t get confused. Did I meet them before?’ I asked.
‘Yes, they met you when you were a baby when we were in London,’ Dad replied. ‘I’ve been wanting to witness to them. My father hasn’t been saved yet, he’s been stubborn, but maybe he’ll pray this time.’
Dad always talked about saving souls. He sincerely believed that without Jesus in their hearts, they were doomed to hell. Dad didn’t want his parents to suffer such a fate in the afterlife.
When I met them, I noticed the difference in their appearance and manner immediately – how reserved they were, and the way Penny, Dad’s stepmother, dressed was different from Family women. Her hair was cropped short and permed and she wore a long-sleeved blouse and trousers. Penny gave me a kiss on the cheek, but there were no hugs, though they seemed happy to see me.
‘My, you’ve grown since we last saw you when you were just a baby,’ Penny said.
The evening they arrived Antonio prepared a delicious pasta dish and we sat together on one of the tables under the trees. Faithy Berg had come for a visit, and introduced herself to them and spoke glowingly of the radio show. Windy and Peter and Rachel played guitar and sang songs from the show. Dad sat beaming with pride, like he was a little boy again, at being able to show his parents what he had achieved.
The next day we accompanied them on a tour of the town, but what I remember most from their visit was the stories Granddad told of when he was a young man. He told stories about his escapades in Palestine during the war as a British army officer. ‘One time I woke up in the morning to find my bed had been stolen right out from under me,’ he chuckled.
My grandparents’ visit and hearing Dad talk about his real mother made me feel special. I was excited that I had another family, my own flesh and blood that was separate from the Family. After Granddad Glen and Grandma Penny left, I wrote letters and sent them drawings and gifts of little things I had made, telling them that I hoped that I would get to see them again.
Perhaps all these family stories struck a chord with Dad. He wanted to know more about his mother and he received permission from Mo to make a trip to Poland to find his mother’s relatives. He was able to track down a surviving relative in Krakow and came back with stories and pictures of my grandmother, Krystina. She looked so young and beautiful in her wedding photo with brown eyes and fine dark hair. Dad told me proudly that I got my singing voice from her. The sad ending to her story was that she got a degenerative illness like mad cow disease and died within months when she was just twenty-four years old. Dad was a little boy of three and a half and had no memory of her, but he idolized her just like I did my mum.
I knew then that Dad and I had a deep link – and understood why he never forced me to have a relationship with my stepmother Serena. I still talked about wanting to visit my mum in India, but Dad told me it was too expensive and he was needed for the radio show. He suggested instead I make a tape for them. I sang my favourite Music with Meaning songs and jingles while shaking a tambourine. When I forgot the words, Solomon Touchstone was there to coach me. I also quoted Mo Quotes and Bible verses. At the end I told Kristina and David that I loved them and to be ‘good witnesses for Jesus’.
Before saying goodbye I said, ‘If I don’t see you here, then I’ll see you in the Millennium.’
This was Dad’s favourite line when I would talk about missing my family. He always said, ‘You’ll see them again soon, if not here on earth, then in the Millennium.’
The end of the world was going to happen any day and it would not be long before we would all be together forever. Whatever my dad said was true. He knew everything. He was also very important, as I discovered one evening we all gathered together for a big celebration. It was the anniversary of Music with Meaning and I was beaming with pride when I learned that we were going to honour Simon Peter – my dad! – as the founder of the show. Mo had declared it ‘Simon Peter’s Day’. I don’t think my father could believe that this was happening and that he and his work was being recognized by the prophet himself. In a glowing letter Mo had even called him Saint Simon Peter.
Adoringly, I stayed by Dad’s side the entire evening. When the ‘birthday’ cake was brought out, Paul passed an envelope to Dad with a large sum of money. ‘Simon, this is for you, to spend in any way you like, along with a full week’s holiday. It’s your just reward for your hard work in the Lord’s service. As you sow, so shall you reap. Praise the Lord.’
There was a further reward to mark that auspicious event. Everyone got a three-day holiday. Of course they were all delighted with Dad and crowded around congratulating him and thanking him. He glowed in their praise and I glowed in his reflected glory as I stood beside him, hanging on to him and gazing up at him – my dad.
After our three-day family holiday Dad took Serena, who was eight months pregnant, to the island of Patmos for his special week’s holiday while I stayed back with Silas and Endureth and my friends Renee and Daniella. When Dad returned, he showed me the pictures they took on their trip.
‘We rode on a donkey. It was really