She bounced into the dining room with more energy than she’d had for weeks. She felt reborn, full of new, shy confidence. She was blooming.
The rain had come to the desert, making the guests uncomfortable and ranching dangerous. The men were working overtime keeping cattle and horses out of the dry washes that could kill so suddenly and efficiently when they filled with unexpected rainwater. The past three days had brought a deluge, and two of the guests were giving up and going home. The other eight were going to tough it out. Nell had smiled at their stubbornness and was determined to make life as pleasant as possible for them.
The guests were having their meal half an hour later than Nell, Tyler and Bella in the huge oak-decorated dining room with its heavy chairs and table and comfortable lounge furniture.
Tyler hadn’t shown up, but Bella was bustling around putting platters of food on the table when she got a glimpse of the mistress of the house and almost dropped the tray she was carrying.
“That you, Nell?” she asked hesitantly, her gray head cocked sideways.
“Who are you expecting?” Nell asked, laughing. “Well, I won’t win any beauty contests, but don’t I look better?”
“Too much better,” Bella said gently. “Oh, honey, don’t do it. Don’t set yourself up for such a hard fall.”
Nell stopped breathing. “What?” she asked.
“You take him things for the cabin,” Bella said. “You sew buttons on his shirts. You make sure he’s warm and dry when it rains. You’re forever making him special things in the kitchen. And now this transformation. Honey, he’s a sophisticated man who was, until just recently, very rich and well traveled.” She looked worried. “I don’t want to smash any dreams, but he’s used to a different kind of woman. He’s being kind to you, Nell. But that’s all it is. Don’t mistake kindness for true love. Not again.”
Nell’s face went bloodred. She hadn’t realized that she was doing those things. She’d liked him and she wanted him to be happy. But it didn’t look like that—of course it didn’t. And her new appearance was going to put him in a very embarrassing situation.
“I like him,” Nell faltered. “But I’m not…not chasing him.” She turned and ran upstairs. “I’ll change.”
“Nell!”
She ignored Bella’s remorseful wail and kept going. But she wouldn’t come back down for dinner, despite the pleading from the other side of the door. She felt raw and hurt, even though Bella had just meant to be kind. Nell was going to have to watch her step. She couldn’t afford to let Tyler think she was chasing him. God forbid that she should invite heartache again.
Downstairs, Tyler and Bella had been sharing a quiet meal. He studied the old woman curiously.
“Something bothering you?” he asked politely.
“Nell.” She sighed. “She won’t come down. She fixed her hair and changed clothes, and I…” She cleared her throat. “I said something.”
“Nell could use a little self-confidence,” Tyler said quietly. “That wasn’t kind of you to knock her down when she was just getting started.”
“I don’t want her to get hurt again,” Bella moaned. “You just mean to be kind, I know that. But that child has never had any affection, except from me. She doesn’t know what it is to be loved and wanted. Her father lived for Ted. Nell was always an afterthought. And the only other time she was interested in a man, she got hurt bad.” She sighed again. “So maybe I’m overprotective. But I just didn’t want to see her throw herself at you because you pay her a little attention.”
“I never thought she was,” Tyler said, smiling. “You’re wrong. Nell’s just being friendly. She’s a cute little kid with pretty brown eyes and a nice way about her. I like her and she likes me. But that’s all it is. You don’t have to worry.”
Bella eyed him, wondering if he could be that blind. Maybe he could. “Nell is twenty-four,” she said.
His black eyebrows arched. “I beg your pardon?”
“Well, how old did you think she was?” the woman asked.
“Nineteen. Eighteen, maybe.” He frowned. “Are you serious?”
“Never more so,” Bella told him. “So please don’t make the mistake of putting her in patent leather shoes and ruffled pinafores. She’s a grown woman who’s lived alone and been slighted all her life. She’s just ripe to have her heart torn out by the roots. Please don’t be the one to do that to her.”
Tyler hardly heard her. He’d thought of Nell as a cute kid, but maybe he’d gotten everything wrong. Surely she didn’t see him as a potential romantic interest? That was just too farfetched. Why, she wasn’t even his type. He preferred a much more sophisticated, worldly woman.
He picked at his food. “I didn’t realize,” he began, “that she might be thinking of me in those terms. I’ll make sure I don’t do anything to encourage her.” He smiled at Bella. “I sure as hell don’t want a lovesick tomboy grabbing me by the boots every time I walk by. I don’t like being chased, even by attractive women. And Nell is a sweet child, but even a blind man couldn’t accuse her of being beautiful.”
“Have some more beef,” Bella said after a minute, grateful that Nell was still up in her room and not likely to hear what he’d said.
Of course, as fate would have it, Nell had started back down the hall and was standing just outside the door. She’d heard every word, and her face was a pasty white. She just barely made it back to her room before the tears that she’d pent-up escaped.
Maybe it had been for the best that she’d found out early what Tyler really thought of her. She’d gone a little crazy because of the attention he’d paid her, but now that she knew what he really felt about her, she’d keep those stupid impulses under better control. Like Bella said, she’d mistaken kindness for interest. And she should have known better. For God’s sake, hadn’t she learned her lesson already? She had nothing that would attract a man.
So she’d dried her eyes and put back on her comfortable clothes, and later she’d gone down to supper as if nothing at all had happened. Neither Bella nor Tyler realized what she’d overheard, and she hadn’t told them.
But after learning how Tyler felt, Nell’s attitude toward him changed. She was polite and helpful, but the light that had been in her eyes when she looked at him had gone out. She never looked directly at him and she never sought him out. The little attentions vanished, as did her shy adoration. She treated him like any other ranch hand, and what she really felt, only she knew. She never talked about him again, even to Bella.
But tonight, in the silence of her room, she still ached for what might have been. It seemed very likely that she wasn’t cut out for a close relationship with a man, much less with Tyler Jacobs. But that didn’t stop her from being hurt by what had happened. It had been the first time in years that she’d made an effort to look like a woman. It would be the last, too, she vowed. She rolled over and closed her eyes. Minutes later, she was asleep.
* * *
A couple of weeks later, the sun was out, thank God, because the recent rains had been catastrophic. Bookings had been canceled and the ranch’s finances had suffered. But now they had all eighteen rooms filled, most of them double occupancy. The ranch catered to families with children, and family fun was emphasized, with hayrides and trail rides and barbecues and square dancing. They did a lot of repeat business. Mr. Howes and his wife had been regulars for ten years, and although Mr. Howes spent a great deal of his time falling off his horse, it never seemed to deter him from trying to keep his girth in the saddle. And despite the fact that Mrs. Sims had been infuriating her ulcer with Crowbait’s homemade firehouse chili for the past five years, she kept trying to eat it. She was a widow who taught school back East during the year