We were shown upstairs to our room and I collapsed on the nearest bed and closed my eyes for a couple of seconds. Or so I thought.
When I woke Peter was standing over me dressed in his ‘respectable’ kit.
‘Come on,’ he said, ‘or we’ll miss dinner. I’ve been down already and it smells gorgeous.’
‘Borrowdale seems a million years ago,’ I commented as I sipped a well-diluted scotch in the bar.
‘Yes, doesn’t it? I bet it’s raining in Seathwaite.’
An anxious little waiter stuck his head round the bar door and waved at Peter.
‘Jesus,’ I said, ‘do you always make friends with the most unimportant members of the domestic staff?’
‘That,’ he said, ‘is Marco. He is Italian. He is here for the season. He is telling me that if we really want our dinner, we’d better get a move on or else the chef, a man with a vicious tongue and I suspect a gangrene on his shin will run amuck. I have ordered for you.’
We went in. Nearly everybody else was at the pudding stage. Over in a corner with a rather pretty young girl was the bearded man who had passed us as we bathed. His semi-formal attire made him look even more distinguished but older too. He must have been well over fifty at least.
He had his back to us but to my surprise the girl on seeing us enter reached over and touched his arm and he turned to look.
With the attractive smile I had remarked earlier, he waved genially, then returned to his food. The girl watched us to our seats, though not blatantly.
The mystery was explained when we sat down.
‘That,’ said Peter, with a flicker of his left cheek muscle in the direction of the bearded man, ‘is Richard Ferguson, the bird-man. With him is Annie Ferguson, the bird.’
‘His wife?’
‘His daughter, you fool. It’s no use looking for reassurance that your advancing years have not put you on the shelf. They’re v. devoted, almost incestuously so. His wife, I believe, is an invalid. Might even be dead.’
I had heard of Richard Ferguson, had even listened to a radio talk of his on one occasion when I had been too comfortable to reach out of my bath to change the station on my transistor. He was much sought after, so I gathered, as a broadcasting pundit. Some accident of chance had led the BBC to adopt him as one of their panel game and quiz team ‘characters’. It seemed almost incidental now that he was also one of the country’s leading ornithologists.
‘How did you meet him?’ I asked.
‘Introduced myself in the bar. When a man’s seen you naked, you’ve taken the first step to friendship after all.’
‘From the way his daughter’s looking at us, he’s obviously described the scene to her too.’
‘Well, it’s too good a tale not to be retold.’
Our soup arrived in the slim brown hands of Marco. I ate with gusto.
Peter’s suggestion that we had a couple of drinks in the bar after dinner I firmly refused. I left him there and watched the telly for a while, struck up a conversation with a couple from London, read half a page of the Daily Telegraph, then went to bed.
It had been a splendid day. I had a self-congratulatory sense of physical achievement. I was well fed, pleasantly sleepy and lay in a comfortable bed. To cap it all, a large yellow moon shone right outside my window. I saluted it and fell asleep.
I don’t know what time Peter came up but when the knock came at our door in the morning he was already up and dressed. He looked pale and told me as we went down to breakfast that he was suffering from sunburn as a result of our bathing party the day before.
‘I can’t walk today,’ he said. ‘I doubt if I’ll ever walk again.’
Marco’s smiling greetings had gone almost unacknowledged and the little Italian did not look at all happy when he brought us our bacon and eggs.
‘Not to worry,’ I grinned. ‘Today we go by train.’
Marco slammed Peter’s plate down in front of him. His thumb was in the fringe of the egg. As he removed his hand the egg came with it, then sliding free, it fell towards Peter’s lap. Peter with the casual rightness so hated by Jan lifted the edge of the tablecloth and caught the greasy object. He looked expressionlessly at Marco, then spoke.
‘Marco, can’t you organize something that makes sense out of this chaos?’
Marco’s underlip suddenly shot out and he began to gabble in Italian, lowly at first, but soon swelling in volume till everyone in the room was looking at us. Ferguson and his daughter, I noticed, had just come in and were standing by the door openly observing the scene with great interest.
Marco reached some kind of climax and halted. I thought of applauding, but a look at his face made me think again. He was very angry. Peter still sat there holding the tablecloth like a bridal train.
Ferguson moved over to us and spoke sharply in Italian. Marco caught the remnants of the egg up in his hand, flung it on to the plate and strode away to the kitchen.
‘Thank you,’ said Peter, releasing the tablecloth and standing up, partly to avoid the last oozings of the egg yolk, partly in acknowledgment of Miss Ferguson who was hovering behind her father. ‘That was kind. May I introduce my friend, Harry Bentink.’
‘Hello, Bentink. We have met in a manner of speaking. And I heard a great deal about you last night.’
‘How do you do,’ I said, half standing up with a bit of fried bread impaled on my fork which I waved nonchalantly at the girl. The bread fell on to the table.
‘You’re not having much luck with this table, are you?’ said Ferguson. ‘Come and share ours.’
He did not stay for an answer but moved across to the corner where he had been sitting the night before. We followed.
‘My daughter, Annie,’ he said. The girl smiled politely but said nothing. I got the impression she was scrutinizing me very closely behind her impassive façade.
‘Are you here on holiday or business?’ I asked.
‘Bit of both,’ he said. ‘Never know what you’ll see on the mountains.’
‘That’s true,’ said Peter in what I recognized as his facetious tone. ‘We saw a blue and a white tit only yesterday, didn’t we, Harry?’
He kicked my leg gleefully under the table. I lashed back and caught the girl’s ankle. She drew away in greater unease than I felt the situation warranted.
‘Sorry,’ I said.
‘That’s all right,’ she said. ‘Will you excuse me?’
She rose and left. She’d only had a thimbleful of grapefruit juice. I let my practised eye recreate the limbs under the skirt as I watched her go through the door and smiled approvingly.
She did not come back and we finished the meal practically in silence.
Replete, Ferguson folded his napkin neatly, looked at each of us in turn and asked, ‘What are your plans today?’
‘We’re going to see the sea,’ said Peter. ‘But first we’re going on a mysterious train journey.’
Ferguson laughed.
‘Oh, Lile Rattie,’ he said.
‘What?’ said Peter.
‘The miniature railway. It’s great fun if the weather’s fine. And it runs to time.’
Peter looked across at me and raised his eye-brows apologetically at having spoilt my surprise. I grinned back and looked suggestively at my watch. He nodded.
‘Well,