‘Enjoy your stay‚ Mr Arav.’
Pathaan bristled at being called that‚ but it was necessity. He had already seen a family hauled in for questioning‚ most likely because at least one of them was called Mohammed. He took back his passport and smiled warmly at the Immigration Officer‚ fantasizing about how he would look with a plastic bag wrapped tightly around his fat head‚ gasping‚ praying for mercy as he died painfully at Pathaan’s feet.
Pathaan placed his sunglasses back on‚ picked up his black leather holdall‚ and walked through Terminal 3 arrivals at London’s Heathrow Airport. Final destination: Hounslow.
I had some making up to do. Damn‚ I had some making up to do. Jack was a sensitive soul; it happens when you grow up without your old man. It was the kind of thing that could make you feel like the whole world was against you; the kind of thing that could make you hard as steel. I knew a little something about that.
I was already beyond late when I pulled up outside Khala’s house. So I left the engine running and hoped for a swift extraction.
‘Crazy boy racer‚ what is wrong with you?’ Khala exclaimed. ‘Did you leave gas on? Is your house burning down?’
‘Sorry‚ Khala. I have to be somewhere.’ I kept my foot firmly on the brake and slipped the gear into first.
‘Switch the car off‚ you are wasting petrol.’
‘Khala... Really‚ I have to go.’
‘What is more important than your future? I am sure Shahzad can wait five minutes more. We need to talk.’
‘I’m not seeing Shaz‚ Khala.’
‘Then?’
Rather than explain‚ I stuck the car into neutral and switched off the engine. ‘Okay‚ Khala‚’ I sighed‚ scratching the hell out of the back of my head.
‘Are you using the coconut oil that I gave you for your hair? It will stop all this itching. You look like a homeless person when you scratch your head like that. Have you seen Doctor? You could have nits.’
I couldn’t help but smile. Yes‚ she was frustrating the hell out of me and yes‚ she was overprotective‚ even for an Asian parent‚ but all her annoying qualities were full of love. I dropped my hands and forced them to stay on my lap.
‘So‚’ she said‚ her eyes sparkling. ‘What did you think?’
‘She was alright‚’ I said.
‘Just alright?’
Rukhsana may possibly have been the most perfect girl that I had ever met. Her baby pink embroidered kameez hid her modesty‚ but it also revealed a little untouched paradise. Her lips were full and red and when she broke out of playing the shy Muslim girl and met my eyes‚ they were full of mischief and promise. With a silvery tone‚ she spoke well‚ able to hold her own in a variety of subjects. She moved us with her considered view on the recent Paris attack and made us howl with laughter with a joke about a Pakistani politician that I’d never heard before. The way she moved across the room made me want –
Damn! I was so late.
‘Yes‚ she was... She was cool‚’ I said‚ as precious seconds ticked away.
‘I know what cool means‚ Beta. Your Khala knows!’ She wobbled her head from side to side. ‘She is cool. Okay I will tell them. You like her‚ yes.’
‘She seems nice‚ but it’s early days‚’ I sighed‚ loudly. ‘Just don’t go buying any gold sets yet‚ okay.’
Khala smiled at me as though she had heard something altogether different to what I had told her. I didn’t have the time or the heart to tell her it could never happen. That was a different conversation for a different day. She put her hand on mine‚ wobbled her head again and finally left.
*
Jack probably didn’t know that his mum was at her bedroom window waiting for me. Stephanie probably didn’t know that her son was at his bedroom window‚ waiting for me.
I killed the engine as I parked in the driveway. Jack beamed down at me and left his station at the window. I got out of the car and waved up at Stephanie‚ but her smile wasn’t as bright. I could hear the scrape of a chair being dragged and I knew Jack was pulling it to the front door to give him height so he could remove the safety chain. The door flung open and he flew at me‚ head down‚ arms pumping‚ bare feet against the cold paving‚ I swept him up in my arms and peppered him with kisses.
Over his shoulder‚ Stephanie was leaning against the door frame. In the photo that she had sent me of them both in the makeshift camp‚ her dark hair was curled‚ and she was wearing a turquoise dress. Her hair was now tied back‚ the dress replaced with jeans and a faded Stone Roses T-shirt.
‘How much trouble am I in?’ I whispered to Jack‚ my eyes trained on Stephanie.
‘Mummy went to the hairdressers today and her hair was curly-wurly.’
‘Wow‚ that much‚ huh?’
I carried him inside and kissed Stephanie‚ she turned her head away and my lips grazed her cheek.
‘It’s past his bedtime‚’ she said.
‘Do you mind if I...?’ I asked‚ and she nodded.
*
I had just finished reading Dear Zoo under the lamp light in Jack’s camp. He was too in and out of sleep throughout to enjoy it‚ and I cursed myself for making him wait so long for me. I lifted the duvet up to his chest and held him from behind‚ waiting for his breathing to settle.
‘Imy?’ he whispered.
‘Jack‚’ I replied‚ pleased in a way that he was still awake.
‘You know Sammy Murphy from Year two‚ he’s in Mrs Stevens’ class?’
‘Sure‚ what about Sammy Murphy?’ I waited for a response. It seemed as though he was weighing up how to say what was on his mind.
‘His dad never plays with him.’
‘Oh‚ I see.’ My heart fell‚ I could already feel what was coming next. Jack never ever talked about his own father‚ but on occasion he would use a proxy to discuss how he was feeling.
‘He’s always late home and then one day he didn’t come home at all.’
I held him a little tighter‚ my face touched the back of his head‚ and smelt the wave of innocence coming off him. I struggled for a response. He fidgeted a bit and then shifted his body around so he was facing me‚ our noses nearly touching.
‘Do you think that Sammy Murphy’s dad doesn’t love him?’
‘I don’t know‚ Jack‚’ I answered truthfully. ‘But you know I love you‚ right? To infinity and beyond‚ and I’ll always be here for you.’
That was the whole truth. I’d fallen in love hard with Stephanie‚ but I loved Jack with a ferocity that frightened me.
‘I love you too‚’ he said and then scrunched his nose. ‘You smell of Indian food.’
‘Yeah‚ I‚ um... I may have had a kebab or two.’
‘Is that why you were late?’
‘Yes.