Healing Your Emotions: Discover your five element type and change your life. Angela Hicks. Читать онлайн. Newlib. NEWLIB.NET

Автор: Angela Hicks
Издательство: HarperCollins
Серия:
Жанр произведения: Здоровье
Год издания: 0
isbn: 9780007483266
Скачать книгу
issues about the rules, boundaries and structures

      

have a hard time making decisions

      

have a directness about their gaze

      The ways of coping which we will discuss next are a response to the Big Issues and Unanswered Questions. Given that these issues are important and that the questions keep recurring, these are the kinds of life styles or behaviours which a Wood type might adopt to deal with their issues.

      Not every Wood type will use all of these coping strategies and there may be other variations which we haven’t observed. It is also possible for other types to behave in similar ways. In this case the behaviours might be less pronounced or have a different set of questions behind them.

      The responses are:

      

Organizing, structuring and getting things right

      

Rebelling against the rules

      

Seeking justice

      

Indirectness

      

Not planning or wanting anything

      We will discuss each of these in turn.

      Wood types can often be concerned about rules, structures and boundaries. Organizing and structuring are natural activities and most of the time they go unnoticed. A plan of what we’re going to do for the day is a structure. We might consider what to wear, how to deal with traffic on the roads, how to prioritize our work, what to buy in the shops or what to eat for supper, all with very little effort. Dividing up the jobs when we go camping is structuring. Deciding how to organize our books on a new bookshelf is structuring. Sorting how we will run a meeting is structuring.

      Wood types often have issues around organizing. This can manifest in their life as a keenness for organizing or the opposite, hating to structure, or both at different times. For example, the Wood type may in their personal life be very poor at structuring, but in their work really enjoy, and be good at it. Harry, a Wood type said:

      I like to get everything sorted out and tidied up, whether it’s the schedules for the week, the invoices sent out or the maintenance jobs to be done. I put everything up on the board and everybody knows exactly what has to be done by when. At home I’m quite different. I’m much more of a slob and I can have difficulty getting even the smallest jobs done.

      Often Wood types who are good at organizing find it difficult when others are not as well structured as they are. They may especially like to see everything done in the correct way. Delia describes this:

      I just challenge things — I pick up on things if they’re not quite right. Things don’t sit comfortably with me unless they’re right and I get frustrated if they’re not. I also expect it of myself and I’m my greatest critic. It might show as impatience. It’s difficult to sit down and let someone else organize something as I know I can do it better.

      Good organization helps people to know where they are. If an organization is not well structured this can create chaos. Lack of structure or things done badly can be especially unsettling for some Wood types who like things to be carried out correctly. For example, Julia told us:

      I hate it when anybody breaks ‘the rules’. I can never understand why people don’t keep appointments on time or don’t keep promises. I have a clear sense of what’s right and I try to follow that. When someone else blatantly ignores what’s right I feel frustrated.

      Good structures and planning should make anything from an office, to a party, to an airport work better. Many Wood types can be found at the heart of an organization feeling literally ‘in their Element’ as they create well-organized administration. They can excel in creating clear rules and guidelines for others and setting up systems. As well as having a flair for administration, some of the many other jobs for good structures could be as architects, town planners, air traffic controllers, accountants, teachers or designers.

      At the other extreme some Wood types don’t relate so easily to rules, structures and boundaries. Any constraints put on them may lead them to rebel.

      The Wood Element gives us the ability to assert ourselves in the world. When it’s imbalanced this natural inclination may become exaggerated. This can lead Wood types to push themselves forward more forcefully than other types. Any obstacle against this force may be kicked to one side. In some contexts this may be seen as rebellion.

      Teenagers often rebel against the rules. This can enable them to find their own identity in order to separate from their parents and family. Jasmine, a Wood type, here recalls being rebellious:

      Historically I found boundaries difficult. I had very constraining parents and I had to break every rule. If I was asked not to do it, I’d do it or I became devious in order to break the rules. I didn’t want to be controlled. I still often feel that way now.

      Often Wood types find that they have an ambivalence about structures and boundaries. On the one hand they can love them because they know where they are with them. On the other hand they might find them constraining and want to push them away. Colin, who was in the fire service, explained this well:

      I hate constraints being set up against me and I immediately rebel. In the fire service I chaffed against the rules and regulations. Then when I became an officer I thought — these aren’t so bad after all.

      When we adhere to good rules things flow more easily. On the other hand, some structures and conventions get out of date or are not productive and it does require confrontation and maybe even rebellion to change these. Social change is in part a record of these rebellions.

      For many Wood types rebellion is their natural environment. If they do not have a worthwhile reason for rebelling, then they will rebel in any case and go for a change. In so doing, they change the distribution of space and we can often feel, from the outside, that our space has been taken up. Simon told us:

      I have a lot of ‘front’. I’m up front and talk to people and tell them what I want. I don’t always give them much space. In fact I can be oblivious to them sometimes. I know if it was me I’d be livid.

      Jacqueline also notices that she feels as if she takes up more space at times:

      Sometimes I see myself as bigger than I am. I often feel that I rise to the occasion. I come over as being assertive and people get the impression that I am assertive. I pull out a confident front although I’m not necessarily at all confident.

      The next pattern is in some ways an extension of ‘being rebellious’.

      Some Wood types use their excess energy and rebelliousness by protesting