“I’m sorry about what happened in high school,” he said quietly.
The words were so at odds with what she’d been thinking that at first she had no idea what he was talking about. When she managed to find context and remembered that horrible day, she flushed and wanted to run away. Instead she forced herself to stay where she was. Her chin came up.
“All right.”
He looked at her. “I panicked. I knew your mom was in her room with Coach and I was pretty sure I knew what they were doing. I didn’t want you to walk in on that.”
Because her mother had been having an affair with the football coach, along with countless other men. Everyone had pretended not to know, all the while being acutely aware of what was happening—Kelly most of all.
As a teacher at the high school, Marilee had had a permanent classroom. One where the door was often locked at lunch. Kelly hadn’t even been thinking as she’d approached. She’d been too distracted by seeing Griffith with his friends.
“I was stupid to say what I did,” he continued. “I know it was a long time ago, and this is late, but I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it.”
“You couldn’t just ask me a question about homework? You had to announce you weren’t the least bit interested in me?”
“I totally blanked, which is the truth, not an excuse.”
She liked that he continued to hold her gaze, as if he wanted her to know he meant what he was saying. And the apology was nice, too. Yes, very late, but still.
“I was humiliated,” she admitted. “Then my mom left and everything changed at home and what you’d said didn’t seem that important.”
Her mom hadn’t just left, Kelly thought grimly. They’d fought. She still remembered the anger between them.
“Why can’t you just be like everyone else?” Kelly had demanded of her mother. “Why do you have to be this way? You’re so selfish. You have a family. You’re supposed to take care of us.”
What she’d really meant was that her mother was supposed to take care of her, but she hadn’t been able to say that.
“I’m not like other mothers. Someday you’ll understand.”
“I won’t. I hate you. If you’re so unhappy, why don’t you just leave?”
“Is that what you want?”
“Yes. Go away. You’re horrible. We won’t miss you at all.”
Marilee’s green eyes had darkened with an emotion Kelly couldn’t understand. “Be careful, darling. Wishes like that can be dangerous.”
The fight had ended then. Kelly had cried herself to sleep—an embarrassing truth for a fifteen-year-old. She told herself it was wrong to hate her mother, to wish her gone, but she couldn’t seem to think any other way. The next day, Marilee had left Tulpen Crossing forever.
That was when everything had changed for all of them. Without Marilee, the dynamics had shifted. They’d all been in pain and reacting. Looking back, Kelly wondered if she hadn’t just lost her mother that day—if she had lost her sister, as well.
“I’m sorry about that, too,” Griffith said. “I know it was tough for you and your sister.”
Olivia had suffered far more than Kelly. While Kelly had wrestled with guilt, she’d still had her dad, and the relative peace that had followed. But Olivia had always been their mother’s favorite. With Marilee gone, she was alone. Jeff’s awkward attempts to fill the void had not been enough.
Kelly knew she should have stepped in, should have done more. Why hadn’t she? A question that still had no answer.
“What I said didn’t help,” he added.
“It’s okay,” Kelly told him. “I appreciate the apology.” She managed a slight smile. “I guess based on our previous conversation, I should assume you’re over your distaste.”
His brows rose slightly. “There was never any distaste.”
“You say that now.”
“You’re going to make me pay, aren’t you?”
“I think a little, yes.”
“Okay. I’ve probably earned it. Thank you for the tour,” he added. “I liked seeing where you work.”
“You should come by when we’re harvesting. It’s pretty exciting.”
“I’d like that.”
“Me, too,” she said before she could stop herself.
He smiled and took a step toward her. For a second she thought he was going to kiss her. She had no idea how she felt about that or what it would be like. Anticipation quickened in her belly right before he lightly touched her upper arm, then turned and walked back toward the parking lot.
She stared after him in disbelief. That was it? What had happened to him wanting to sleep with her? Why hadn’t he made his move?
She put her hands on her hips and glared at his retreating back. Men were stupid. All of them, but mostly Griffith.
* * *
Helen finished locking the front door of the diner. The downside of her job was starting so early in the morning. The upside was she was usually out by three in the afternoon—earlier if she could get her food orders in during the mid-morning lull.
She dropped her keys into her bag and turned to find Jeff standing a couple of feet away.
She pressed a hand to her chest. “You startled me.” Which was the truth and also better than her next thought, which was more along the lines of how good he looked. All manly in his plaid shirt and jeans.
“Were we supposed to go to JML or something?” Because while Jeff was a regular at the café, he’d already been by for breakfast. He wasn’t generally an afternoon kind of guy.
“No. I wanted to talk to you.”
For a second she allowed herself to hope that he’d finally come to his senses, realized he was madly in love with her and was here to declare himself. Or at least try to get in her pants, but she was okay with that, too.
“I’ve been thinking about what we talked about before,” he began. “About the women I see in Seattle.”
Yes? Yes? She did her best to look completely normal when on the inside she was doing a competition-worthy cheer routine. Oh, please, oh, please let him want sex with her. Wild, crazy, hot monkey sex.
“You caught me off guard with your questions. I didn’t know what to say.” He raised one shoulder. “I guess I was embarrassed.”
“About what?”
“I don’t know. People talking.”
“No one’s talking. I observed.” Although she did think other people had noticed, she wasn’t going to tell him that.
“My point is, you’re right. We’re friends. Good friends. So ask me what you want to know and I’ll do my best to answer your questions.”
The hot, glowing sex bubble inside of her burst with an audible pop. “That would be great. Probably not right here.”
He looked around at the empty café parking lot. “Probably not.”
They walked the quarter block to her small house, the one she’d bought after her aunt and uncle had moved away. It was just over fourteen hundred square feet, with nice light and an updated kitchen. But what had sold her on the place was the oversize living room with the perfect space for her piano. The small upright was one of the few things she had from her parents. The piano