‘I was going to ask you, Super,’ Fox said. ‘You don’t mean to say you think they may actually have beheaded the old chap then and there!’
‘How could they!’ Carey demanded angrily, as if Fox and Alleyn themselves advanced this theory. ‘Ask yourself, Mr Fox. The idea’s comical, of course they didn’t. The thing is: when did they? If they did.’
‘They?’ Alleyn asked.
‘Well now, no. No. It was done, so the doctor says, and so a chap can see for himself if he’s got the stomach to look, by one weapon with one stroke by one man.’
‘What about their swords? I’ll see them, of course, but what are they like?’
‘Straight. About two foot long. Wooden handle one end and a hole t’other through which they stick a silly-looking bit of red cord.’
‘Sharp?’
‘Blunt as a backside, all but one.’
‘Which one?’ asked Fox.
‘Ernie’s,’ Alleyn said. ‘I’ll bet.’
‘And you’re dead right, sir. Ernie’s it is and so sharp’s a razor still, never mind how he whiffled down the thistles.’
‘So are we forced to ask ourselves if Ernie could have whiffled his old man’s head off?’
‘And we answer ourselves, no, he danged well couldn’t of. For why? For because, after his old man dropped behind the stone, there was Ernie doing a comic act with the Betty: that is, Mr Ralph Stayne, as I was telling you. Mr Ralph having taken up a collection, snatched Ernie’s sword and they had a sort of chase round the courtyard and in and out through the gaps in the back of the wall. Ernie didn’t get his sword back till Mr Ralph give it him. After that, Dan Andersen did a turn on his own. He always does. You could tell it was Dan anyway on account of him being bow-legged. Then the five Sons did another dance and that was when the Old Man should have risen up and didn’t and there we are.’
‘What was the Hobby Horse doing all this time?’
‘Cavorting round chasing the maids. Off and on.’
‘And this affair,’ Fox said, ‘this man-woman-what-have-you-Betty, who was the clergyman’s son: he’d collared the sharp sword, had he?’
‘Yes, Mr Fox, he had. And was swiping it round and playing the goat with it.’
‘Did he go near the stone?’ Alleyn asked.
‘Well – yes, I reckon he did. When Ernie was chasing him. No doubt of it. But further than that – well, it’s just not believable,’ said Carey and added: ‘He must have given the sword back to Ernie because, later on, Ernie had got it again. There’s nothing at all on the sword but smears of sap from the plants Ernie swiped off. Which seems to show it hadn’t been wiped on anything.’
‘Certainly,’ said Alleyn. ‘Jolly well observed.’
Mr Carey gave a faint simper.
‘Did any of them look behind the stone after the old man had fallen down?’ Alleyn asked.
‘Mr Ralph – that’s the Betty – was standing close up when he fell behind it and reckons he just slid down and lay. There’s a kind of hollow there as you’ll see and it was no doubt in shadow. Two of them came prancing back to the stone during the last dance; first Simmy-Dick and then Mr Ralph, and they both think he was laying there then. Simmy-Dick couldn’t see very clear because his face is in the neck of the horse and the body of the thing hides any object that’s nearby on the ground. But he saw the whiteness of the Fool’s clothing in the hollow, he says. Mr Ralph says he did, too, without sort of paying much attention.’
‘The head –’
‘They never noticed. They never noticed another thing till he was meant to resurrect and didn’t. Then Dan went to see what was wrong and called up his brothers. He says – it’s a funny sort of thing to say – but he says he thought, at first, it was some kind of joke and someone had put a dummy there and the head had come off. But, of course,’ Carey said, opening his extremely blue eyes very wide, ‘it was no such matter.’
There was a long silence. The fire crackled; in a distant part of the pub somebody turned up the volume of a wireless set and turned it down again.
‘Well,’ Alleyn said, ‘there’s the story, and very neatly reported if I may say so, Carey. Let’s have a look at the place.’
II
The courtyard at Mardian Castle looked dismal in the thaw. The swept-up snow, running away into dirty water, was much trampled, the courtyard itself was greasy and the Mardian Dolmen a lump of wet rock standing on two other lumps. Stone and mud glistened alike in sunlight that merely lent a kind of pallor to the day and an additional emphasis to the north wind. The latter whistled through the slits in the old walls with all the venom of the arrows they had originally been designed to accommodate. Eight burnt-out torches on stakes stood in a semi-circle roughly following that of the wall but set some twelve feet inside it. In the middle of this scene stood a police sergeant with his mackintosh collar turned up and his shoulders hunched. He was presented by Carey – ‘Sergeant Obby.’
Taking in the scene, Alleyn turned from the semi-circle of old wall to the hideous façade of the Victorian house. He found himself being stared at by a squarish, wooden old lady behind a ground-floor window. A second lady, sandy and middle-aged, stood behind her.
‘Who’s that?’ he asked.
‘The Dame,’ said Carey. ‘And Miss Mardian.’
‘I suppose I ought to make a polite noise.’
‘She’s not,’ Carey muttered, ‘in a wonderful good mood today.’
‘Never mind.’
‘And Miss Mardian’s – well – er – well, she’s not right smart, Mr Alleyn.’
‘Like Ernie?’
‘No, sir. Not exactly. It may be,’ Carey ventured, ‘on account of in-breeding which is what’s been going on hot and strong in the Mardian family for a great time. Not that there’s anything like that about the Dame, mind. She’s ninety-four and a proper masterpiece.’
‘I’d better try my luck. Here goes.’
He walked past the window, separated from the basilisk glare by two feet of air and a panel of glass. As he mounted the steps between dead braziers half full of wet ash, the door was opened by Dulcie.
Alleyn said: ‘Miss Mardian? I wonder if I may have two words with Dame Alice Mardian?’
‘Oh, dear!’ Dulcie said. ‘I don’t honestly know if you can. I expect I ought to remember who you are, oughtn’t I, but with so many new people in the county these days it’s a bit muddly. Ordinarily I’m sure Aunt Akky would love to see you. She adores visitors. But this morning she’s awfully upset and says she won’t talk to anybody but policemen.’
‘I am a policeman.’
‘Really? How very peculiar. You are sure,’ Dulcie added, ‘that you are not just pretending to be one in order to find out about the Mardian Morris and all that?’
‘Quite sure. Here’s my card.’
‘Goodness! Well, I’ll ask Aunt Akky.’
As she forgot to shut the door Alleyn heard the conversation. ‘It’s a man who says he’s a policeman, Aunt Akky, and here’s his card. He’s a gent.’
‘I won’t stomach these filthy ’breviations.’
‘Sorry,