The Comic Latin Grammar: A new and facetious introduction to the Latin tongue. Leigh Percival

are the ablative’s ends, – mark my song,

      While or to the nominative case doth belong;

      For the neuter aforesaid we settle it thus:

      The plural is ora; the singular us.

      If than is, er, and or, it hath many more enders,

      The nominative serves to express the three genders;

      But the plural for ia hath icia and itia,

      As Felix, felicia – Dives, divitia.

      COMPARISONS OF ADJECTIVES

      Comparisons are odious —

      Adjectives have three degrees of comparison. This is perhaps the reason why they are so disagreeable to learn.

      The first degree of comparison is the positive, which denotes the quality of a thing absolutely. Thus, the Eton Latin Grammar is lepidus, funny.

      The second is the comparative, which increases or lessens the quality, formed by adding or to the first case of the positive ending in i. Thus the Charter House Grammar, is lepidor – funnier, or more funny. – The third is the superlative, which increases or diminishes the signification to the greatest degree, formed from the same case by adding thereto, ssimus. Thus the Comic Latin Grammar is lepidissimus, funniest, or most funny. A Londoner is acutus, sharp, or ’cute, – a Yorkshireman acutior, sharper, or more sharp, ’cuter or more ’cute – but a Yankee is acutissimus – sharpest, or most sharp, ’cutest or most ’cute, or tarnation ’cute.

      Enumerate, in the manner following, with substantives, the exceptions to this rule, mentioned in the Eton Grammar.

      Adjectives ending in er, form the superlative in errimus. The taste of vinegar is acer, sour; that of verjuice acrior, more sour; the visage of a tee-totaller, acerrimus, sourest, or most sour.

      Agilis, docilis, gracilis, facilis, humilis, similis, change is into llimus, in the superlative degree.

      Agilis, nimble. – Madlle. Taglioni.

      Agilior, more nimble. – Jim Crow.

      Agillimus, most nimble. – Mr. Wieland.

      Docilis, docile. – Learned Pig.

      Docilior, more docile. – Ourang-outang.

      Docillimus, most docile. – Man Friday.

      Gracilis, slender. – A whipping post.

      Gracilior, more slender. – A fashionable waist.

      Gracillimus, most slender. – A dustman’s leg.

      &c. &c.

      If a vowel comes before us in the nominative case of an adjective, the comparison is made by magis, more, and maximè, most.

      Pius, pious. – Dr. Cantwell.

      Magis pius, more pious. – Mr. Maw-worm.

      Maximè pius, most pious. – Mr. Stiggins.

      Sancho Panza called Don Quixote, Quixottissimus. This was not good Latin, but it evinced a knowledge on Sancho’s part, of the nature of the superlative degree.

      OF A PRONOUN

      A pronoun is a substitute, or (as we once heard a lady of the Malaprop family say), a subterfuge for a noun.

      There are fifteen Pronouns.

      Ego, tu, ille,

      I, thou, and Billy,

      Is, sui, ipse,

      Got very tipsy.

      Iste, hic, meus,

      The governor did not see us.

      Tuus, suus, noster,

      We knock’d down a coster-

      Vester, noster, vestras.

      monger for daring to pester us.

      To these may be added, egomet, I myself; tute, thou thyself, idem the same, qui, who or what, and cujas, of what country.

      DECLENSION OF PRONOUNS

      Pronouns concern ourselves so much, that we cannot altogether pass over them; though a hint or two with regard to the mode of learning their declension is all that we can here afford to give. We are constrained now and then to leave out a good deal of valuable matter, for the reason that induced the Dublin manager to omit the part of Hamlet in the play of that name – the length of the performance.