Anxiety and Depression Workbook For Dummies. Laura L. Smith

or interests at first. I got good grades in chemistry, and that is what started my interest in chemical engineering. 8. Were there any historical or cultural events during my childhood that had an impact on my development? I remained on the sidelines about politics at first when I went to college, but I had strong feelings about the issues. I was too shy to assert my thoughts for quite a while. During my college years I learned quite a bit about the world that my limited experiences as a kid in the suburbs did not prepare me for. 9. What are the major events of my adulthood, such as trauma or winning the lottery? I graduated from college, got married, and had a couple of kids. My divorce after 14 years of marriage came as a shock, but I got through it okay. 10. What did this exercise teach me about the origins of my anxiety or depression? When I think back on my childhood, I realize it wasn’t very happy. My dad didn’t seem to care much about me. My mother cared more, but she was like an emotional roller coaster. I just shut down, and I think I’ve had that tendency my whole life. Maybe I’m shutting down now, too; it’s what I do when I’m unhappy. I guess I realize that I’m not totally to blame for my problems. It sort of makes sense that I shut down whenever I face possible rejection or criticism or when someone gets angry with me.

      After completing the Emotional Origins form, Tyler has a better understanding of why he copes with stress the way he does. He sees that there’s a reason he shuts down when facing certain types of situations. The exercise isn’t about blame and faultfinding; rather, it helps Tyler forgive himself for being the way he is. These insights start him on the path toward a new beginning.

Complete your Emotional Origins form in Worksheet 2-4. This is an important exercise, so take as much time as you need. If you happen to be receiving counseling or psychotherapy, your therapist will no doubt find this information useful and informative.

      Start by reflecting on your childhood. You may jump-start your memory by talking with relatives or by looking through old photo albums. Then move on to answer the questions about your parents or caregivers as well as the questions about your childhood and adolescence. Don’t worry about getting all the details right — just do the best you can. Memories aren’t always completely accurate, but in a powerful way, they affect the way you feel today.

Please realize that the intent of this exercise is not to place blame on your parents or other important people in your life. These people indeed may have made significant contributions to your problems, and that’s useful to know. But they came by their own problems as honestly as you did. Understanding helps; blame and faultfinding do not.

Worksheet 2-4 My Emotional Origins

Questions About Your Caregivers 1. Who were the primary caregivers in my childhood, and what were they like? Describe their personalities. ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. How was love and affection expressed by each caregiver? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 3. How was conflict expressed and resolved? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 4. What did I get in trouble for? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 5. How was I disciplined? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 6. Were my caregivers critical or supportive? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 7. Does anything else important about my caregivers come to mind, whether positive or negative? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Questions About Your Household 1. What were my earliest memories? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 2. What were my best memories of childhood? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________