Officer Bolton took a call and moved away from them. Danica stopped and glanced back at the officer.
Being this close to her was dangerous for his sanity. The sun was high over the hills, and a soft breeze played with her red curls, picking up golden highlights. A random strand crossed her face, and she tucked it away only to have it fall loose again.
Her hair always fascinated him. He’d called it red. She’d told him it was strawberry blond. From that day on, he’d loved strawberries.
She wore it shorter now. In college, it hung below her waist. Fisting his hands, Reid stuffed them in his back pockets to keep from touching her.
This was not how he’d imagined their first meeting, and he had spent hours daydreaming about it. Then again, prison wasn’t in his plan on the day he had promised to love her forever.
She cut a hard glare at him. Caught staring, he suddenly found his worn boots fascinating. He had no right to be thinking of her or looking at her.
From the corner of his eye, he glanced at the porch. She scanned the area with short jerky movements. Taking a step closer to him, she twisted and lowered her head, trying to make eye contact with him. He gave in and stared right at her.
The connection didn’t last long. Danica quickly looked away. “You’ve been in prison? I don’t understand. Why are you here now? After all this time?” She bit her lip and straightened. Back stiff and arms crossed, she looked off to the surrounding hills.
Reid had always loved the way she showed her emotions around him, not afraid or ashamed. But now he could see her fighting back the tears, fighting to be stoic with each blink. Her bottom lip disappeared between her teeth. Instinct told him to hold her, to reassure her.
Stalling for time, he cleared his throat and prayed for the right words. Fully aware there weren’t any. “Baby, I know sorry is not good enough for what I did to you, but it’s all I have.”
No explanation was good enough. He shrugged. “I didn’t mean to show up on your doorstep unannounced this way. I didn’t know he was bringing me to you.” His throat was still dry, but he had so many words he needed to say to her. “He just told me a wildlife rescue program needed a vet tech.”
When his mentor had showed him a list of jobs needing his skills, he couldn’t believe there was a ranch close to her hometown. Wanting to see her so badly, he thought maybe it was God giving him an opportunity to make it right. Now he realized it could have been his pride. “If me being here is a mistake, let me know and I’ll leave.”
An annoyed sound came from her beautiful lips. “What did you hope to achieve? I’ve moved on. You told me you had decided to go home. That our marriage was a mistake and you wouldn’t be back. One phone call and you left me without a way to get in touch. You just left.” Her breathing was short and hard.
The numbness that encased his heart a couple of years ago slipped a bit, and he stood before her with fresh wounds. He rubbed his face and focused on the hills. He didn’t have the strength to be near her and not want to be in her life. She had been his until he’d destroyed their future. He knew right then that without her forgiveness, he was still in prison.
“Danica, our marriage was a mistake. My family tradition is failure, prison and violence. I thought I had escaped, but it followed me. I’m not asking to be part of your life, but I’m here with the skills you need. Let me help until you get someone else.” He clenched his jaw and looked over her shoulder at the building behind her. Chipped paint revealed years of neglect.
His own father had destroyed his beautiful Creole mother. Now the promises he’d made Danica lay shattered on the ground. To keep his hands out of trouble, he stuffed them in his pockets. His gaze was not as easy to control. Tall and lean, she was so much stronger than his mother.
At least he hadn’t brought children into this mess.
Without a word, she stared at him. Guilt and shame were heavy burdens to carry. Lowering his head, he took deep breaths. In prison, he’d learned really quickly to avoid eye contact, and it was hard to change the habit.
Officer Bolton joined them. “Call just came across the radio. During a drug bust on the edge of the county, they got a surprise in the basement. They found a caged bear and an old black jaguar. The cat has a bad leg. There was talk of putting the animals down. I told them I was with you, and we could transport the animals here. I already called Dr. Ortiz to meet us there.” He smiled at Reid. “Initiation by fire. It looks like you’re jumping into the deep end today.”
Reid looked at his wife. No, he couldn’t think of her in those terms. It was too dangerous to get wrapped up in what could have been. Her hard glare felt like heat burning his skin, starting at his neck and traveling down.
Bolton slapped him on the back, causing him to jerk around. The officer laughed. “You go in the truck with Danica. She’ll update you. I’ll wait for you to gather your things, and you can follow me.” With a big smile, he headed to his patrol car. “Welcome to the world of rescue.”
“Come on, Mr. McAllister.” She didn’t wait for him. “I need to get the supplies. Have you moved large sedated animals before?”
He followed. “A few times, Mrs. McAllister.”
She stopped in front of him, and he bumped into her back. His hands went to her arms to prevent her from falling forward. He shouldn’t have been so close. In that instant, he reacted as if she was still his. He closed his eyes and inhaled her scent, savoring the shape of her arms under his hands.
With a twist, she was out of his reach. Her breathing made her shoulders rise and fall in quick succession. “I never changed my name. I’m a Bergmann, and we don’t forget. And we sure don’t forgive easily. So, you will call me Ms. Bergmann. No one knows I married you, and it will stay that way.”
With the precision of a general, she turned and marched to the small house. He followed. He had a feeling he would follow her to his death if she let him.
Sometimes when something was broken, fixing it wasn’t an option. The best a person could do was throw it away and move on. God, is this where You wanted me, or am I being a stubborn fool?
The patrol car slowed down in what looked to be the middle of nowhere, surrounded by nothing. Perfect place for activities that needed to be hidden from the law. Except they found this one.
“Is it safe for you to be out here?” He didn’t like the idea of her being around these kinds of lowlifes, the kind that made up his family.
With a quick glare, she gave him his answer loud and clear. It left a bitter burn in his gut to see the hostility coming from eyes that used to look on him with love.
They followed the county car down a narrow, overgrown dirt road. It was another five or six miles deep into the wooded ranch before they came up to a fortress-like structure. Who would want a home that looked like a prison on the outside?
Once through the gate, a building that looked more like a Malibu beach house appeared before them. Several different types of law enforcement were coming in and out of the house. Boxes and computers were being loaded into vans.
Cold sweat broke out over Reid’s entire body, and his skin shrunk around his bones. Three breaths in and one long exhale helped a little. They were not here for him. They weren’t taking him back to the small windowless concrete cell. He was free and not doing anything that would put him back there.
“Reid? Are you okay?” Hearing her voice calmed him better than all his coping techniques and self-induced pep talks.
Trying to give her a reassuring smile, he nodded. “Just a few too many uniforms