“Blake.” Her clutching fingers told him she was close to another climax.
He’d been distracting his mind to prolong their encounter, but as her nails dug into his back and her cries grew more frantic, Blake loosened the hold on his willpower and thrust powerfully into her. Capturing her pleasure in a hot, demanding kiss, he slipped his hand between their bodies and touched the knot of nerves that would send her spinning into another orgasm.
As her body contracted, he let his own climax catch him. With a final thrust, he buried his face in her neck and gave her everything. Shuddering, his arm muscles unable to support him any longer, he collapsed on her.
“Now, that was amazing,” he said, chest heaving as he struggled to recover.
Eyes glowing with contentment, Bella parted her lips to respond, but before she could, a cry erupted from beyond the room. Recognizing the quality of the cry, Blake nevertheless willed his son back to sleep. It was a fruitless proposition.
Another unhappy wail filtered in from the nursery, this one of longer duration than the last. Drew didn’t sound as if he was going to settle down on his own.
Blake put his forehead against Bella’s shoulder and heaved a sigh. “I’d better get him.”
“Let me.”
With an abrupt shake of his head, Blake pushed away from her warm, silken skin, grinding his teeth as he was pummeled by the room’s cool air. “I’ve been through this with him. I’ll have an easier time getting him back to sleep.” He covered her with the sheet and bent down to buss her cheek. “Sleep.”
“Sure.” She gave him an uncertain smile.
Blake’s movements felt jerky and uncoordinated as he slid back into his clothes. His muscles hadn’t fully recovered from the mind-blowing sex with Bella. He cast a final look her way before he headed for the doorway. What he saw gave him pause.
If not for his son’s escalating distress, Blake would have lingered to reassure Bella that he too had been affected by the power of what had happened between them. The last thing he wanted with any woman was to take her to a vulnerable place and abandon her there. He sensed Bella wasn’t the sort of woman who took sex lightly.
Which meant leaving her so soon after being intimate would undo some of the rapport they’d established. She’d had her doubts earlier, but he’d been able to reassure her. Abandoning her in his bed would give her ample time to reestablish her defenses.
But there was nothing to do about that. His son needed him. It was something Bella understood. She’d often put her family’s needs above her own; it was a big part of what appealed to him about her. On the other hand, when she’d decided to cut off all ties with Drew, she’d demonstrated that like his ex-wife, she had a selfish side.
And what of his decision a mere three hours ago not to complicate their relationship by acting on his desire for her? He certainly hadn’t been thinking about what was best for his son while he made love to her. What he needed was a mother for Drew. Bella wasn’t interested in the role.
So why had he felt compelled to have her spend part of the summer with them? Had he hoped if she spent time with Drew her maternal instincts would awaken?
When he got to the nursery, Blake lifted his son into his arms and rocked him the way he knew Drew loved. Almost immediately the infant’s cries waned. He met Drew’s eyes and felt peace wash through him. He wanted the world for his son, but right now he would settle for a mother who would love him with her whole heart.
Which was why making love to Bella tonight had been a mistake. They could no longer pretend to be simply boss and employee. But he couldn’t promise to keep his hands off her in the future. He’d told Jeanne he intended to put Drew first the next time he married. Getting involved with a woman who didn’t want to be a mother ran contrary to that determination. But being with her felt so right. What the hell was he supposed to do?
Abandoned in Blake’s enormous bed, Bella pressed a pillow against her stomach and curved her naked body around it, coiling herself into a tight ball. The instant he’d left the room, her sense of belonging had vanished with him.
Earlier, while Blake was dining with his stepsister, she’d glanced into the master bedroom. Residual traces of Victoria—like the photographs in the living room—lingered in the large, beautifully decorated space. Blake’s ex-wife remained a presence in the house, and Bella felt like an imposter. An interloper. Had she really just made love to Blake?
The riotous sensations still buffeting her body as well as the residual tingle left behind by the imprint of Blake’s lips told her she had stepped across a line. And now that she’d left footprints in forbidden territory, there was no taking it back. But was that what she wanted? To unmake the memories of the past hour?
Bella rubbed her hot cheeks against the cool sheets. Nothing could have prepared her for the explosive quality of Blake’s mouth on her body. The things he’d done. No one had ever kissed her like that before. Done things to her body that made her go wild. To say they were unmatched in experience was woefully inadequate. She’d had so much to learn. Tonight it had been all she could do just to hang on for dear life as he took her on an epic ride. In the aftermath, she recognized that a man as sophisticated as Blake would expect his lover to match him in skill and knowledge.
Through the door Blake had closed behind him, Bella could hear Drew’s continuing cries. The instinct to go to him thundered through her. He was her baby. Comforting him was her job. Her responsibility.
Except that it wasn’t. Drew belonged to Blake. And in a way, to Victoria. She might have abandoned him, but as far as the world knew, Blake’s ex-wife was his mother. Bella was just someone who’d acted as a surrogate. A living incubator. Well paid and insignificant the second Drew was born.
But his cries tore at her. No matter how hard she tried to be sensible, the need to cuddle him until his tears dried up was so much more compelling than her desire to be free of responsibility. The war between her brain and her emotions was leaving her confidence in tatters. Her doubts about the choices she’d made about Drew were growing stronger day by day.
As Bella threw back the covers, the house went silent. She held her breath, waiting for the cries to start again, but no sound stirred. Far from anything resembling sleepiness, Bella dressed and eased out of the room. Drew’s door was shut, but a faint light glimmered beneath. Tiptoeing forward, she drew close and heard Blake’s deep voice. He was telling Drew a story, his tone pitched to engage an infant.
Reluctant to enter the nursery and disturb what Blake had accomplished, Bella retreated toward her room, but instead of heading inside, she took the stairs to the first floor.
In bare feet she was able to move soundlessly across the polished wood floor of the living room. Drawn by the light of the moon, she crossed to the windows that overlooked the ocean. Snagging a throw from a nearby chair, she wrapped it around her shoulders before letting herself out the door.
A wide porch stretched across the back half of the house, offering a place to rest and enjoy the view. White wood lounge chairs covered with thick, cobalt-blue cushions were scattered here and there. Straight ahead a wide set of steps led to an expansive lawn. At the far end, a boardwalk split the vegetation capping the low dunes lining the beach. A light wind carried the sound of the surf to Bella’s ears. She headed down the steps and across the lawn.
From her first glimpse at the ocean last summer, it had been love at first sight. Everything about the beach had fascinated her, from the birds to the myriad of trinkets left behind by the tide to the pulse of the ocean itself. With her toes gripping the sand, she’d stared at the horizon and pulled the briny air into her lungs, letting the sights, sounds and smells fill her with peace.
She’d been close to her due date and riddled with doubts that she was doing the right thing by herself