Taunts, riddles and secrets. Юрий Михайлович Низовцев. Читать онлайн. Newlib. NEWLIB.NET

Автор: Юрий Михайлович Низовцев
Издательство: ЛитРес: Самиздат
Серия:
Жанр произведения: Юмор: прочее
Год издания: 2019
isbn:
Скачать книгу
>From the come

      awareness of self who was earlier the irresponsible ape.

      Why atheists do not trust in "Afterlife"?

      They are similar to those who believe that the medal has only one side.

      Who is right – materialists or idealists?

      Neither those, nor others: where can consciousness build a nest without matter? And is it possible to test matter without consciousness!?

      Why does time for happy life doesn't come?

      Because somebody hours aren't watched, others have no watch, and all else are just waiting in the wings.

      What is most important in a person?

      The ability to take aim – everything else lives aimlessly.

      In what does the principal difficulty of mankind consist?

      In absence of understanding of that, what it generally is necessary for.

      What is through the looking glass?

      Nothingness, which turns around to thou.

      1. Fresh pranks

      Why all are going to the zoo?

      To admire by itself in development.

      Why love to caress cats?

      For lack of more worthy object.

      Whether understands parrot own chatter?

      Only partly, but he likes it, and he is not stopping soon.

      What special quality of the real housewives are the best?

      By their richness – like the bun.

      Where to now sit thieves?

      Everywhere.

      Why beggars have such look of suffering?

      They always consider that they are given a little.

      There is "Manneken Pis" (A pissing boy) in Brussels. And what is at us?

      We may piss anywhere.

      How the spirit is strengthened not so bad?

      By acquisition of boots with foot bindings.

      What a stick is good in?

      It is possible to force down with its help not only pears.

      What do cornered people make?

      Japanese – Hara-kiri;

      Russian – drunkenness;

      American – business;

      German – the order;

      The Frenchman – champagne;

      Englishman – soccer;

      Chinese – a kite;

      The Hindu – nirvana;

      Jew – a sell.

      Why the monkeys any more do not turn into people?

      They had seen enough on them.

      Why in the Russian language, almost all words are borrowed?

      Apparently, Russians learned to speak later all.

      Whether so really the person is perfect?

      It is possible to learn it, having looked at a fly creeping on a ceiling.

      Why do people trust the deceivers?

      And why husband believes to wife?

      Who occurs from a cow?

      Exclusively good-natured persons, but in insufficient quantity.

      What the bald head can be useful for?

      For additional lighting of the space.

      What is better to drink?

      What into a throat flows and it is not being spillt.

      How are combined boiling water and crayfish?

      Just as boiling water and people, up to reddening.

      What cheap cologne beats expensive perfume in?

      It replaces vodka at an extreme.

      For what pants are necessary?

      To cover, inasmuch their opening does not make a contribution to science.

      When women begin to get smarter?

      Some – already after fifty.

      Where did nudists undertake from?

      From sin, that they do not hide.

      From what a goose to a pig is not a comrade?

      From the different feeding troughs.

      Whether will triumph of validity?

      When the cancer shall start to whistle at mount.

      How to become rich?

      Initially make poor.

      Is it good to be as the pensioner?

      If thou survive – will find out?!

      Why with fat rage?

      Demons prefer excess to drawback.

      When the person craves the most.

      When he has no money.

      Why in Asia pilaf is eaten with hands?

      Spoon it is possible not to be in time.

      What thinks the ram, looking at a new gate?

      What it does not concern him.

      Who is this tailor?

      The man who is able to strip through the glance of every which wants to get dressed.

      In what is dissimilarity of a pig and a person?

      The person is capable to turn into a pig, and the pig – doesn't even try.

      Why distribution of medals begins?

      To distribute money there is no desire.

      Whether devil confuses us?

      Not devil, but jurists.

      What can be extracted from slops?

      Quite good pork gammon as a result.

      What is the difference of traders and women?

      Shopkeepers try to sell everything, except themselves, and women try to sell themselves for the sake of everything else.

      What does a vegetarian differ in?

      Biased attitude to vegetables.

      For what civilians grow moustaches?

      For giving of themselves of military daring.

      What does the playing sport harm to?

      Strengthening muscles, it straightens the brain crinkles.

      What American Negros are close to the Russian people in?

      Set free rather recently from bondage, both those, and others yet haven't managed to adapt to will.

      What will be with motorists soon?

      They will disappear.

      In what is the use of wrinkles on a physiognomy?

      They allude to wisdom, which may completely absent.

      What attracts delirium of the ill by?

      It is possible to learn a lot of useful from it.

      What is characteristic for any