First published in Great Britain in ebook format in 2015
Published in this ebook edition by HarperCollins Children’s Books in 2020
HarperCollins Children’s Books is a division of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd,
HarperCollins Publishers
1 London Bridge Street
London SE1 9GF
The HarperCollins Children’s Books website address is
Text copyright © Alice Oseman 2020
Cover design © HarperCollinsPublishers 2020
Alice Oseman asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this ebook onscreen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.
Source ISBN: 9780008389666
Ebook Edition © July 2020 ISBN: 9780008147877
Version: 2020-08-05
‘Yes, very indifferent indeed,’ said Elizabeth, laughingly. ‘Oh, Jane, take care.’
‘My dear Lizzy, you cannot think me so weak, as to be in danger now?’
‘I think you are in very great danger of making him as much in love with you as ever.’
Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
Contents
One
Charlie
Nick
Charlie
Nick
Two
Charlie
Nick
Charlie
Nick
Charlie
Nick
Three
Charlie
Nick
Charlie
Nick
Four
Charlie
Nick
Five
Charlie
Nick
Charlie
Nick
Six
Charlie
Nick
About Alice Oseman
Books by Alice Oseman
About the Publisher
As Head Boy of Truham Grammar School, I’ve done many things. I got drunk on the wine at parents’ evening. I’ve been photographed with the mayor three times. I once accidentally made a Year 7 cry.
But none of that was quite as bad as having to stop everyone in Year 13 from enjoying their final day of school, which is what our head teacher, Mr Shannon, is trying to make me do right now.
It’s probably worth mentioning that my boyfriend of two years, Nick Nelson, is one of those Year 13s.
‘You don’t mind, do you?’ Mr Shannon leans on the common-room table where I’m supposed to be revising for my exams but am actually watching Mac DeMarco concerts on my phone. ‘It’s all got a bit out of hand and I think they’d be more likely to listen to you than me, if you see what I mean.’
‘Erm …’ I shoot a look at my friend Tao Xu who’s sitting next to me eating a packet of Galaxy Minstrels. He raises his eyebrows at me as if to say, ‘Sucks to be you’.
I don’t really want to say yes.
Year 13’s final day of school is High School Musical themed. They’ve hung a giant ‘East High’ sign over the Truham one at the school gate. They’ve been playing the soundtrack on classroom computers, so wherever you are in the school you can hear a High School Musical song playing from somewhere, but you’re never quite sure where. They participated in a ‘What Time Is It’ flash mob on the football field at breaktime. And they have all turned up to school either in red basketball outfits or cheerleader outfits. Disappointingly, Nick went for basketballer.
To top it all off, on a non-HSM-related note, they’ve built a fort out of cardboard boxes on the tennis courts and are having a barbeque inside it.
‘I just want them to put the barbeque out,’ says Shannon, obviously detecting how reluctant I am to walk into a box fort of one hundred and fifty people older than me and tell them to stop having fun. ‘You know. Health and safety stuff. If someone gets burnt, I’ll be the one dealing with angry parents.’
He chuckles. Mr Shannon has come to trust me completely over the several months I have been Head Boy. This is hilarious because I rarely do anything he tells me to do.
Keep the teachers on your side and the students on your side. Don’t make enemies or too many friends. That’s my advice for getting through school.
‘Yeah, sure, no problem,’ I say.
‘You’re an absolute life saver.’ He points a finger at me as he walks away. ‘Don’t revise too hard!’
Tao looks at me, still shoving chocolate into his mouth. ‘You’re not actually