The IMMORTALITY Of INFLUENCE
SALOME THOMAS-EL
WITH
CECIL MURPHEY
KENSINGTON PUBLISHING CORP.
http://www.kensingtonbooks.com
CONTENTS
Foreword by Will Smith
Acknowledgments
1. Failed Influence
2. Commitment to Personal Influence
3. The Influence of Parents
4. The Influence of Husbands, Children, and Siblings
5. Influence Through Discipline
6. Healthy Influence
7. The Influence of Grooming
8. The Influence of Exposure
9. Influence in the Workplace
10. The Influence of Respect
11. The Influence of Love, Caring, and Friendship
12. The Influence of Faith
13. Influence on Purpose
14. The Influence of Forgiveness
15. The Influence of Leadership
16. Being Influenced
17. The Influence of Giving Back
18. Influence on Our Communities
19. The Power of Unrecognized Influence
20. The Legacy of Influence
FOREWORD
by
Will Smith
If you finish this book and are not inspired to immediately go out and effect change in your community, then you were not paying attention and should read it again. Salome Thomas-EL was called to serve and has had amazing experiences in his career as a teacher and author. He uses these experiences and his own personal struggles and triumphs to inspire a new generation to pick up the torch of service. With this book, he illustrates how as responsible adults we can and should influence those around us for the better, beginning with leading by example. He draws attention to the scores of children who are labeled early on as “lost causes,” and he points out that if we allow them to go through life without any positive role models, then they will become self-fulfilling prophecies. But, if someone takes the time and does not give up, Thomas-EL knows from personal experience that these children can grow up and become some of the best minds of the next generation.
Influence is a powerful tool, one that we often forget that we wield. The hidden danger is that we never know exactly who we are influencing and what it is we do that influences them. Every time we interact with people, we are giving them an impression of who we are, what we believe and what we think of them. It is important that we make choices that we would want others to emulate, not only those of us that work in a very public position like Thomas-EL as a principal and myself as an entertainer, but anyone who is a parent, brother, sister, son, daughter, cousin, friend, neighbor, colleague—the list goes on. You never know who is looking to you for inspiration, so first and foremost you must be mindful of the message that you are sending out.
In today’s media-saturated society, it is hard to miss so many of the tragedies that have hit our worldwide community. Between the tsunami in Southeast Asia, Hurricane Katrina in the Gulf Coast, and the continuing AIDS epidemic in Africa, there are plenty of reminders that suffering is a universal constant. While it is important to contribute to our local communities, we should always be mindful that we are part of a global environment. Although money is often requested to aid victims both at home and abroad, time is also one of the most valuable donations we can make. Giving of one’s time to any of these causes is just as meaningful as writing a check.
So read this book, be inspired by the great things that Thomas-EL has accomplished in his community, and take that inspiration and make an impact in your own. If influence can be immortal, then why not make yours worth remembering?
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
In 2005 we lost a tremendous number of influencers who have shaped us as a nation and people
IN MEMORIUM
Constance Baker-Motley, Stan Bernstein, Johnny Carson, Shirley Chisolm, Johnnie Cochran, Ossie Davis, Arthur Fletcher, Peter Jennings, John Johnson, Pat Morita, Rosa Parks, Pope John Paul II, Richard Pryor, Chief Justice William H. Rehnquist, C. Delores Tucker, Luther Vandross, August Wilson, Georgie Woods and many, many more. Your Influence Lives On!
To the victims of hurricanes Katrina and Rita and all other natural disasters: Your courage and determination has inspired us all to remember that we are brothers and sisters in this world together! A special thank-you to the many celebrities who used their influence to make a difference in the lives of others: Oprah Winfrey, Will Smith, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Ellen DeGeneres, Tavis Smiley, Tom Joyner, Dr. Phil McGraw, Jamie Foxx, Harry Connick Jr., Branford Marsalis, Master P, Dave Matthews, Celine Dion, Kanye West and so many others. God Bless You All!
I would like to thank God (Our Creator) for loving me unconditionally. None of my work would be possible without your love and blessing. To my lovely wife, Shawnna: Thanks for persevering through the tough times with me and loving our children faithfully. A mother’s love and attention are so important to children. Your constant editing of my writing and speeches has allowed me to look good and take all the credit. Keep up the good work! To my baby girls, Macawi and Nashetah: Continue to grow into intelligent and strong young ladies who will lead this nation, and take care of Daddy and Mommy when they are old and gray. To my greatest influence, my mother, Amena, who is resting in heaven: Save me a place because someday I will be worthy of your company. I am sure you are praising God every day with our beloved sister Delores who is with you. To my family: Thank you for always supporting me and keeping me focused on the mission of service. I have learned that it is not about me. It is about us! To my mother-in-law, Delores: Thanks for being a wonderful mother and grandmom, helping us navigate this thing called parenting, and influencing us every day. To Karen and Dexter: Thanks for the countless hours of cheap, expert legal advice.
To Cecil Murphey and Deidre Knight: Thank you so much for your support and love over the years; CAA: Your representation and hard work with Disney on my behalf is appreciated. It does not get any better than you; My editor at Kensington, Karen Thomas: You have surpassed my expectations again and continue to amaze me. You are a powerful influence on your authors; Steven Zacharius and everyone at Kensington Publishing: Thanks for believing in me the second time around. I promise not to disappoint you; Ellie Deegan (The Lecture Bureau) and Nancy Eisenstein (American Program Bureau): Thanks for ensuring that people around the country get to hear my message. Derek and Quentin: Thanks for your friendship.
To Will Smith and family: Thanks for being great role models as parents and philanthropists. You make us all proud; Lonnie Downs, Jana Babatunde-Bey and everyone at Overbrook Entertainment: Thanks for your support and love; Tim Chambers: Thanks for believing in my story and inspiring me with the title for this book. You are truly a special person; Gavin and Greg O’Connor at Solaris: Thanks for giving my students a chance to tell their story to the world; Walt Disney Company: Your commitment to our project will send a message to our nation that every child matters.
Thanks to all of my former teachers; the Association of Black School Administrators (ABSA); the faculty, staff, students and alumni of Nova Southeastern University, Cheyney University, East Stroudsburg University, and Philadelphia Futures; Thank God for the staff at Bryn Mawr, Children’s and Lankenau Hospitals; My pastor and