The Wheel of Life
The eight sections of the Wheel of Life represent a balanced wheel. Take the centre or hub of the wheel as 0 (totally dissatisfied) and the outer edge as 10 (totally satisfied). Rank your level of satisfaction with each area of your life by putting a cross on the relevant spoke. Draw a line to join the crosses together.
How balanced does the shape of your wheel look? Which of the areas of your life are you currently happy with? Where do you want to make improvements? (You might want to refer back to this wheel when you answer the questions at the end of this step.)
Jim Rohn
The Wheel of Life
As you begin to transform your life there are a variety of personal qualities I’d like you to develop to help make your transition into the next phase of your life as smooth as possible.
Take a look at the statements below and out of 10 rank yourself to indicate which of the two descriptions is nearest to the truth for you at the moment.
Select the qualities you want to work on.
Take Responsibility for your Life
We each hold our life in the palm of our hand. What we think, say and do from one minute to the next can have a dramatic impact on our own lives and the lives of those around us. At the end of the day we are all personally responsible for our own life – and to a great degree, it’s up to us to choose what we do with it. Accepting full responsibility for your life is the starting-point in the 10-step process. When you accept that you create your own world, your life really can open up before you. At times it can be tempting to blame other people or circumstances for what happens, but when you do this essentially you’re disempowering yourself, which doesn’t really get you anywhere. As your coach, I want you to choose to accept responsibility for all that happens to you in your life from now on – good or bad, positive or negative. Whilst you can’t determine the behaviour of those around you or influence natural disasters or acts of God, you can choose how you react to them. I want you to acknowledge that your behaviour is the result of your own choice.
Develop a Strong Sense of Personal Integrity & Honesty
Life becomes significantly easier when you’re able to live honestly with yourself When you fully master this quality, few things can really threaten you. You’ll find you have fewer problems and possess an innate sense of inner peace and calm. When you know and accept yourself for who you are as a person and are genuinely giving of your best, you don’t have to waste your time and energy trying to be anything else.
Being ‘in integrity’ means not only accepting responsibility for your actions, but also being true to yourself, having self-respect and taking good care of all aspects of your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual being. Are you doing the best for yourself and your body? Are you stressed out? Are you eating and/or drinking too much? Are you running on adrenalin? Are you overlooking problems? Are you avoiding telling the truth? Are you not taking adequate time for yourself?
A person who is ‘out of integrity’ is like someone whose spine is out of alignment – their total being is unable to operate at its optimum capability. When your life is out of integrity, things tend to go wrong and you’re highly likely to blame others. You’ll know when you’re out of integrity when there are significant gaps between what you say and what you do.
You can start to enhance your own personal integrity by identifying 10 areas of your life where you’re not currently telling the full truth – either to yourself or others. List them and then write next to each one the actions you will take to address it and the date by which you will have completed them.
I’d like you to tackle two of these issues each week over the next month or so until you know you’re living a fully authentic life.
William James
Don’t ‘Should’ on Yourself
When you’re out of integrity and out of alignment with your own true self, it’s likely you’ll find yourself doing things because you feel others expect it of you rather than doing things because you really want to do them. This is where the ‘shoulds’ and ‘oughts’ come in. Coaches have a very useful phrase: ‘Don’t should on yourself.’ In essence, if you say you ‘should’ or ‘ought to’ do something, unless you know it’s something you genuinely need to do, the chances are the statement is coming from someone else’s agenda and not from your own.
Be aware in your day-to-day life of how many times you say ‘I should do this’ or ‘I should do that’ – for example, do you ever say to yourself ‘I should lose weight’ or ‘I should change jobs’? Stop and think. Ask yourself: ‘Is this something I genuinely need or want to do?’ I’m not suggesting you abdicate responsibility for things that it is necessary for you to do. We all have things in life that we don’t particularly enjoy doing (housework or paperwork, for example), but we know we need to get them done. These are basic needs that you knuckle down and get on with. Equally, you may be required to take care of the needs of someone else (a sick relative perhaps), which is a question of facing up to your responsibilities. From a realistic viewpoint, I’d like you to be aware of your needs, responsibilities and wants and make choices accordingly. If your ‘should’ is neither a need nor a genuine responsibility nor a want, I suggest it is not a true expression of yourself and not appropriate for you to do!
I actively encourage you to connect as much as you can with the real reasons why you do things. If something doesn’t feel right to you, don’t do it. For example, if you find yourself working extra hours each week, ask yourself, ‘Is there a good reason for this? How is it serving me?’ If the answer is that this is something you need to do, because you’re being paid overtime and you need the extra money perhaps, or the project is important to you, your company, client or customer, and you will all benefit, then the justification is there. However, if the real reason you’re working