WHAT
WOMEN WANT MEN TO KNOW
The Ultimate Book About Love, Sex,
And Relationships For You – And The Man You Love
BARBARA DE ANGELIS, PH.D.
To the one I waited for all these years,
in honor of Love that does not flee from the face of fire, but joyfully submits, knowing that, through grace, it will be transformed into gold.
CONTENTS
PART I: WHAT WOMEN WANT MEN TO KNOW ABOUT US
3 Women Have a Sacred Relationship with Time
5 Women Need to Feel Connected
7 Seven Myths Men Believe About Women and Why They Are Absolutely Wrong
PART 2: WHAT WOMEN WANT MEN TO KNOW ABOUT LOVE, INTIMACY AND COMMUNICATION
8 How to Avoid Turning a Perfectly Sane Woman into a Raving Maniac
9 How to Be the Perfect Lover Outside of the Bedroom
10 Five Secrets About How Women Communicate
11 The Top Ten Male Communication Habits That Drive Women Crazy
12 What Women Hate to Hear Men Say and What Women Love to Hear Men Say
PART 3: WHAT WOMEN WANT MEN TO KNOW ABOUT SEX
14 Women’s Top Twenty Sexual Turn-Offs
15 Women’s Top Twenty Sexual Turn-Ons
I wrote this book for you, and for the man you love. I believe that it is a book every woman has always wished existed, a book she could give to her mate that would effectively explain all the things she wanted him to know about loving her. “Read this,” she would say, “and you will understand me.”
How many times have I myself wished for such a book: times when it was clear that, once again, I had failed to successfully convey my needs to my partner; times when, no matter how hard I tried, I could not convince him that if only he would make one small gesture or handle a situation a bit differently, things would be so much easier between us; times when my attempt to communicate what I wanted and why it was important to me resulted in him concluding that I was simply too needy rather than being motivated to do something that would make me happy. In these, and so many other moments, I would sigh, as all women have undoubtedly sighed for thousands of years, and wish there was some way I could get through to him, some way to make him understand.
If you are a woman reading this, you know this sigh well. It is the sigh that whispers, “I just want him to care enough to really see who I am.” It is the primal need to be known, to be valued, to be accepted just as you are. Of course, we all have tasted this experience of another soul truly knowing ours. Ironically, it is the bond we have with other women – our girlfriends, our sisters, our colleagues – where the very kind of deep comprehension of who we are and what we are trying to say happens effortlessly, and almost instantaneously.
Does the following story sound familiar?
You are sitting across from a girlfriend at lunch, and early on in the conversation you start to explain a problem you are having in your relationship, or something your mate did that upset you. Within moments of your initial remarks, your friend seems to understand exactly what you mean. She nods her head sympathetically, shows concern for all the right issues, and even finishes your sentences with the perfect words. And as you look at her gratefully, something inside you sighs with relief and exclaims: “YES! That’s exactly how it is … You know just how I am feeling!”
The conversation continues, and within ten minutes, you and your girlfriend have agreed on solutions to a whole list of issues that you and your husband have argued over, with no resolution, for ten years. You’re amazed at how effortless the discussion is, how completely she comprehends your emotions, your reactions, your needs. You shake your head in frustration, knowing that if you try to bring up these same topics with your mate, his response will be quite different: thinly veiled irritation; eye-rolling; sighs of weary exasperation; and numb, emotionless stares, as if you were not speaking